Talk:Unrivaled/@comment-7706473-20130919065809

Whoa - whoa, slow down! Was that *AGATHA* who freed up the narrator? Left unspoiled for those who don't get it/read the comments first (if you're one of those people, try to kick the habit. I was there once, too) - before anything else, I really like that idea. It just fits thematically, and makes the final image and imagery of waiting alone in the cave all the more appropriate. Maybe it's just because both are reclusive, and somewhat enigmatic.

For me, the story of this character was even more engaging than countless hours spent looking for pokemon under trucks. Why the heck were they just waiting around, in a dark and abandoned cave..? The story has three parts. One is essentially our narrator talking about how powerful are - but with unreliablity and hint of mania; I think this part works the best because even if you don't guess who the narrator is, you already know you're stepping into the mindset of someone who was imprisoned, for a long time.

And now, they are in a prison of their own making. Waiting. Listening. The second and third parts aren't frightening more then they are - sad. You have a deep sense that the narrator feels bound to destiny (DESTINY BONDed? ahaaaa okay that one was terrible), and excited to fight a battle that might lead to a repeat of the events before - or not, destiny being the fickle thing it is. With the knowledge that the reader has, the clincher is both suitably ominous - and more then a little cool.

Spoilers beyond this point, yar.

To me, that little island and Mewtwo just waiting - without any purpose that we could see - was infinitely more frightening than the ruined mansion on Cinnabar or rumours about the S.S. Anne. It may just be because I wondered about aimlessly after defeating Mewtwo, but something seemed off. No one addresses this cave - close enough to Ceruleon to swim too! - and yet inside and unspoken of, something lurks...

So this worked really well for me. I picked up on it almost from the title alone, because more so than your 'rival', Mewtwo is both the most challenging opponent and yet a being from nowhere, with no relation to the story. An antirival, a moment beyond the credits. And catching it early on built the suspense for me; like a first-time player of the first generation games, stepping foot into that cave once more...

A peach blossom, for captivity the narrator might wish to forget. Highly enjoyable!