User blog:Creeper50/The Right Leader: Full Outline (Revision 3)

Hello guys, this is the third draft of the full outline to my full-length comic book that I'll be working on. I want you people to say how good it is, in terms of characters and stories. Did I flesh them out enough? Does the plot have any holes? Are the characters consistent and empathetic? You tell me what you think. (If you're wondering, the LTs at the bottom are comments, many of which are for lengthly parts of exposition inserted in as comments so it doesn't bloat up the length of the paragraph explaining what the exposition in the scene was.) Anyway, here's the outline:

Scene 1:

Greg is kidnapped by a man, and is sneaked into a truck outside of Green Farm. As the truck drives away, we get a shot of Green Farm.

Purpose: To introduce Green Farm, the wasteland around, and set up the initial conflict.

Scene 2:

The next day, a debate is occurring on what to do now that Elijah, monarch of rival city Midnight Light, has kidnapped Greg. Aaron, his father and a military “general” who leads Byron’s second largest “squad.” Everyone thinks that immediately sending troops to save Greg would be risking too much for one person. Aaron reluctantly agrees.

Purpose: To establish the enemy, Elijah and Midnight Light, Aaron, and his rank.

Scene 3:

Aaron, now on his shift of supervising the soldiers guarding the borders, is toying around with the computer attached to his Eagle-2065 gun, when he receives a message from Elijah. It is a video of Elijah, who starts by expressing his anger of how slow-paced the war between Green Farm and Midnight Light is, followed by announcing that if Aaron doesn’t get Byron to send his best squads, Greg will be killed.

Purpose: To establish this new gun, that this story takes place in the future, and force Green Farm to attack at nearly full force.

Scene 4:

Greg is dragged into a room by a guard, then Elijah comes in. He explains that this is where he’ll be staying, afterward, Greg yells back at him, but then Elijah scares Greg into stopping by talking about his big authority status. Greg looks around his room and notices a computer in the corner. Shaking and sweating, he goes to it and tries to connect to a nearby internet server, but it requires a passcode. Greg scoffs in response to this. Despite this, though, he still hesitates when he begins to hack.

Purpose: To establish Greg’s fear of disobeying the higher authority and hint at his hacking abilities.

Scene 5:

After his shift is over, Aaron storms into Byron’s meeting room when he’s alone and tells him about the video. Byron thinks for a moment, then apologizes and says that they can’t send so many at full force just for one person. Aaron tries to convince him, but fails. When it doesn’t work, Aaron pulls out his gun and demands that he sends the squads Elijah asked for. Byron distracts Aaron for a second a pulls out his gun. Aaron prevents Byron from shooting him by stating how important Byron is to his war against Midnight Light. Byron, as a result, reluctantly gives in.

Purpose: To get the best squads sent and establish Aaron’s aggressive and impulsive personality.

Scene 6:

<p class="MsoNormal">Elijah is seen on the balcony of his large, but crudely made mansion, looking down at Midnight Light, where makeshift shelters and businesses are everywhere. He polishes his purple mask, goes back inside, and makes a sarcastic joke toward a picture of a woman hanging on the wall.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To hint at his backstory, establish him as a rich man, establish the survival-of-the-fittest nature of Midnight Light, and Elijah’s sense of humor, as well as his mysterious obsession with his mask.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 7:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron is walking with Stan toward their tanks. Stan brags about how big his army squad is, and they discuss how Green Farm is a city that, like in good capitalism, rewards those who work harder.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To establish the acquaintanceship in between Stan and Aaron, Stan’s show-off personality, his rank, and one reason these two value Green Farm so much.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 8:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron, now outside the walls and separated from Stan, gets into his tank, which has many workout devices, as well as an empty bookshelf tucked into the corner. Aaron charges up his tank, as do the other people in his squad, and they move forward. During the two hour trip, Byron alerts them of his plan. Stan and his squad will attack from the east side, which may have been weakened by the constant wind blowing west in the past few months. Aaron and his squad, meanwhile, will attack from the sewer, where they can infiltrate the city. If the plan fails, they will rush back to their tanks and join Stan and his squad.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To provide a means of reflecting Aaron’s weakness of valuing strength over strategy, and to show what the initial plan for attacking the city will be.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 9:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg is hacking. He just managed to determine what the Wi-Fi passcode is and enters it. Afterward, he does some more hacking, and finds Elijah’s browser history. He finds one that is where he stores files, and after breaking into that, finds a folder called “important archives.” In it, he finds a private website with screenshot of a series of texts in between Elijah and Stan about a secret weapon. Before Greg can read what it is, though, Elijah comes in, causing Greg to frantically delete everything. Elijah sees he’s deleting something, though, and takes the computer away, although he can’t get Greg to tell him what he was doing.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To provide another obstacle for Greg and reveal Stan’s betrayal, as well as hint at the secret weapon we will see later.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 10:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron charges through the sewers with his soldiers. They charge, and initially, they seem to be winning, but all of the sudden, they’re guns (Eagle-2065s) stop working. Remembering Byron’s plan, they retreat back to their tanks, but it turns out that they were disabled while they were gone somehow. Aaron decides they should try to fight hand-to-hand, and it ends in a blood bath for a good deal of soldiers before the remaining hide behind the disabled tanks. Aaron gets criticism for this, which he justifies by stating that Byron’s plan clearly didn’t factor the guns and tanks getting disabled. Afterward, one soldier points out that Aaron’s gun is the only one that is still working. The soldiers become suspicious that he hacked the guns.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To have Aaron first receive criticism for his internal weakness, and to point suspicion of who hacked the guns and tanks toward him.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 11:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg is trying to figure out how to get out of the room so he can find another computer. He finds a loose brick on the wall, and is about to pull it out, but his fear of disobeying authority stops him. He takes a few deep breaths, then just manages to overcome his fear enough so he can pull off the brick. Afterward, he gathers up just enough courage to chip away at another brick so it becomes loose for him to pull that one off. After Greg is done with a few bricks, Elijah comes in to bring him some lunch. Greg tries to hide the work he’s doing by stalling with a conversation and standing in front of the hole he’s making, but Elijah soon figures out what’s going on. He tells Greg he’s going to be stored in a mental institution cell complete with security cameras.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To have Greg get a step closer to overcoming his fear and have Elijah up the security, which will gradually prompt Greg to take more and more extreme action against authorities to escape.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 12:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg has been transported to the mental institution. There, he meets some of the people there, most of whom strike Greg as perfectly sane. They reveal that many of them were former guards who didn’t like the secrets Elijah let them in on, so they were sent there to imprison them and discredit their stories if they ever told them. Greg talks a lot with one named Chris Boat. He lets Greg in on many of the immoral acts of Elijah and Greg plans to escape, find a computer, and hack for evidence to turn Elijah’s people against him. Eventually, Greg, over a game of chess  , asks about helping him escape. It takes a bit of convincing, but Greg finally, through persuasion, manages to convince Chris to help him. Also, in passing, over that game of chess, Greg mentions that he once set up a makeshift radio show, and as a result, knows a lot about computers.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To have Greg meet Chris Boat, learn a few dark secrets of Elijah, and convince Chris to help him.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 13:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron and his troops are hiding behind a tank. They decide that they will attack in a few hours after they’ve rested in the disabled tanks. In the middle of the night, however, Aaron is woken up and told that his soldiers have found overwhelming evidence that he hacked the guns. One soldier points out that he and a few others hacked Aaron’s computer attached to his Eagle-2065 and found some text messages (which look exactly like the ones between Aaron and Elijah, only with Stan’s name replaced with Aaron’s) between Aaron and Elijah that incriminate him, and they chase him away. He hides in the sewers. There, he gets the idea that someone set up him.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To have Aaron kicked out of his own army and have him get the idea that he was set up.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 14:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron sneaks back to where his army is, and gets ahold of the man who presented the incriminating evidence against him. He holds the man hostage and away as the awoken men chase after him. After finding a hiding spot behind some rocks, he interrogates the man and makes him reveal that he is working for Stan, who is a spy for Elijah, along with half of Stan’s squad. They couldn’t hack the guns and tanks from far distances, because Elijah didn’t finish developing the software to hack from farther distances. After a bit more, Aaron makes the man reveal that once they can hack from farther distances, they will hack all of Byron’s central computer systems. Also, they incriminated Aaron because it would be a good way to make people less concerned about having their communication cut off because they’d think the man responsible was already discovered.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To have Aaron learn about Stan and Elijah’s plan and decide to force Stan to confess.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 15:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron fights his way through the sewers, and gets to an exit drain that leads to where Stan is. He grabs ahold of him and threatens to strangle him if he doesn’t confess, along with his troops. The troops working for Stan reveal what they’re doing, and the squad collapses as the people within it don’t know the difference between friend and foe.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To have Stan’s planned reveal and the army break up into Stan’s half and Byron’s half.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 16:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg and Chris are planning when they’re going to steal the key and run out the door. They decide at lunch time, which soon comes. Afterward, Chris tells Greg that he had a son, who has died of leukemia. He kept a cheap laptop from before the Fog War in a toy boat when it wasn’t charging. Chris further elaborates that it is buried near a hill next to a house. He tells the address of the house. They are about to undertake this plan, but Greg hesitates, due to his fear of disobeying authorities. Chris Boat tells him “Well, these authorities ain’t right.”   Greg gathers up just enough courage and they get the key and run toward the exit. Chris is tackled, he throws the key to Greg, and he unlocks various doors until he finds the exit, unlocks it, and dashes out.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To have Greg have a quote to hold onto in order to overcome his fear of disobeying authorities, even when their wrong. Also, to have Greg escape the mental institution, and hint at the existence of the Fog War.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 17:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg makes his way to where Chris Boat said the toy boat was, outrunning the police officers who chase after him. He finds the house and quickly starts digging. He notices a new family inside the house and does the digging quietly, having to hide a few times to avoid being caught. Soon, he finds the computer and dashes into an alleyway to avoid detection. He turns on the computer, which has only 30 percent of its charge left. Greg uses the internal Wi-Fi of the computer and hacks the files from Elijah he hacked earlier. He finds one that is a video chat that is happening live in between Stan and Elijah, discussing how they’re about to hack Byron’s central computer systems to gain control of all the weapons, now that they have the software to hack from farther distances.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To have Greg find the computer and the information he needs.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 18:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron is in the middle of an intense conflict between the divided halves of Stan’s squad. On his gun, he sees he has a video message. He opens it and hears Greg’s voice. He alerts that Stan’s plan has begun, since they have the needed software now. Greg also explains that the files he hacked reveal that this mission to get Greg back was in order to distract the people so Stan could potentially hack in piece. Greg then says that if Aaron sends him software meant for the Eagle-2065’s computer, he could stop the hack. Aaron does so, and in the nick of time, scaring Stan’s half of Stan’s squad away.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 19:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg then looks at the text messages he saw only part of earlier between Stan and Elijah talking about the secret weapon. Greg tells Aaron that it was meant to be used if Stan’s plan failed. It is something called the “Teddy Bear”, which has a slogan carved on its side that says “Straight from the printer.” After Greg informs Aaron of this, the Teddy Bear, which is a giant tank, breaks through the wall of Midnight Light and lays waste to the remaining troops of Stan’s squad. They retreat toward where the sewer entrance was, and after a bit of fighting, catch up with what was once Aaron’s squad. They explain what happened. Afterward, the sewer begins to cave in from the weight of the Teddy Bear, forcing them to escape.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 20:

<p class="MsoNormal">After they escape, Aaron orders the troops to attack at full force. After a bit of arguing, they do. This leads to the Teddy Bear shooting at them, killing a good deal of them, along with Aaron’s gun, and they die for nothing, as they barely make a dent in the tank. When Aaron faces criticism, he justifies it by stating that they couldn’t get a plan from Byron, so why not just attack? Afterward, Greg says that if Aaron sends one more appropriate program, he can hack the Teddy Bear so it explodes. However, it would destroy all of Midnight Light, along with all of its inhabitants, including Greg. Aaron refuses. With no option, the troops hide behind a corner of the wall of Midnight Light. They notice that the Teddy Bear is headed straight for Green Farm, presumably to destroy it, but is very slow, and will take about 5 days to reach the town. Most of the soldiers want Aaron to do what Greg suggested. Aaron, ignoring them, suggests going inside Midnight Light and finding a way to destroy it from there. After he suggests this, Greg screams on the other end and the communication goes dead. They decide to go inside and see what caused this. While trying to get inside from the sewers, they hear a rumble that fades over the next few minutes. Oddly, though, when they enter through the sewers, they find the place completely abandoned.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 21:

<p class="MsoNormal">Flashback. Greg hears the sounds of the Teddy Bear from the other side of the computer. This causes him to crack, drop the computer, and flee into the open, alerting the family in the house he was digging around. They panic, causing guards looking for Greg to rush to the scene and find Greg. As he is dragged away to somewhere, he notices that there are people dressed in uniforms similar to riot gear, shooting seemingly random civilians. Greg is dragged into the building of Midnight Light Military Operations and knocked out.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 22:

<p class="MsoNormal">Back to the present. Aaron and his troops hear a gun shot from the Midnight Light Military Operation building. When they enter, they find that there is a woman dressed in the riot gear shooting at some computers. They overwhelm her and demand to know what happened. She states that he’s very deep underground, but before they can ask where, she grabs her gun and shoots herself. Afterward, they look at the computers and find that they are all damaged, but the screens appear to be struggling to show an image of some town.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 23:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg wakes up, in a bed, and is told by a woman standing next to it that she was told that he was knocked out by a gas leak, and that his parents were killed by it. Greg, knowing that’s completely false, ask where he is, and he’s told he’s in a town called Green Hill. Greg is then alerted that a man named Elijah, who is the shadowy mayor of Green Hill, is about to adapt him. This startles Greg. He is then urged to go back to sleep. He is angry, but is also tired, and decides he’ll tackle this problem in the morning. Afterward, the woman leaves the room, goes to her private bedroom, and through her computer, informs Elijah that Greg seems obedient enough so that he won’t escape before he can “go through with his plan.” The woman, notably, sounds nervous.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 24:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron and his troops search the building. One, named Sofia, finds a chute and they go down it. When they do, they are in a town called Green Hill. As they walk through, they are recognized by a group of guards, led by Stan. Stan orders the guards to capture them, which they do after a chase which fails because Aaron doesn’t think which directions they go in as they run. As they are dragged away, Aaron demands to tell him how they got back, and Stan reveals that outside the wasteland, there are hidden chutes to go straight to Green Hill here and there.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 25:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron and his troops are captured. They are sent into an execution building, where they’ll be killed by lethal injection. Aaron is going last because Stan considers him the worst of the bunch and wants to see him watch his troops get killed one-by-one through the window on the door. Aaron strangles a few guards, one-by-one, with his handcuffs, and steals a key to free himself. By the time he does so. Only one person is left for him to save: Sofia. He kills the executioner before he executes her and they then fight their way out. They then sleep in an ally.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 26:

<p class="MsoNormal">The next day, Aaron and Sofia are walking through the streets, hiding in alley ways frequently and trying to keep a low profile, and as they do so, Aaron points out how this place vaguely reminds him of Green Farm, although he can’t quite see why. As they walk, they notice the place is very similar to Midnight Light, and even pass by a sign that says the place is called Green Hill. Around the next corner, they notice something: a speech, happening, and it has Stan giving a speech of how 2 of the prisoners have escaped and that they could be among the crowd watching the speech right now. Aaron almost charges in and attacks, but Sofia convinces him to stop and she proposes a plan: they kidnap one of the guards surrounding the crowd and interrogate him for information on Greg’s whereabouts, as Sofia reasons that the guards, since they’re dressed in the same uniforms, and therefore they’re probably the same ranks, and have access to the same information.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 27:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg has awoken. Breakfast time. At breakfast, he tries to glean information from the kids who sit with him at the breakfast table. He learns the various lies the people of Green Hill have been told, mainly about terrible things Green Farm supposedly has done like “child trafficking” and creating nuclear bombs even after the Fog War damaged much of the ozone layer. Also, Greg hears that this place has a computer room.

<p class="MsoNormal">Purpose: To establish that the citizens of Green Hill have clearly been brainwashed in a way.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 28:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron is trying to carry out the plan while Sofia   watches from the bushes as backup. Aaron starts by following the plan very well, but in Stan’s speech, he starts listing the ways you can detect that one may be involved with Aaron and Sofia, and he states that one sign is a crouched stance and a head down that implies sneaking. One child next to Aaron, taking note of this, sees Aaron in his crouched stance and tells a guard near Aaron about it. The Guard goes up to Aaron and sees his face. This causes all the guards to dash forward and began attacking him. Aaron, in response to this unanticipated factor, abandons the plan and begins to fight in an attempt to get away, stealing a guard’s belt and using the baton in it in the process. Sofia comes stealthily picks off guards in attempt to help Aaron. In the end, they, when they have temporarily outrunned the guards, they duck into a closed clothing shop and steal some clothes to disguise themselves. They duck into an alley and watch Stan, who is leading the guards chasing them. He contacts someone using the computer in his gun, and after a bit of talking, he announces that in order to prevent this from happening again, one, their on curfew so the people can’t use the cover of darkness, and two, anyone who sees anyone displaying the signs mentioned in the speech should report to the guards, and if it turns out they withheld such information, they will be punished. Lastly, Aaron and Sofia decide, exhausted from that fight, to start settling in this alley for the night, even though it is still afternoon. In order to get food, they eat the ants, as they require no preparations and are common in these alleyways. As for water, they find there is a well from where water is distributed, along with some bottles, but it is guarded, presumably to prevent someone from taking too much, so Sofia and Aaron sneak in it and steal some water from it. As they steal the water, they notice a building labeled as a radio center, and hear on speakers mounted on buildings biased stories of how great Elijah is being told.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 29:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg, during recess, asks when they go into the computer room. Greg is told in a few days. Greg then asks when he’ll be picked up by Elijah, and he’s told tomorrow. Greg then says he needs to use the bathroom and is told to be back before recess is over, which is in 10 minutes or someone will be sent to look for him. Greg goes inside. He hesitates, as he has that fear of disobeying authorities, and he just manages to overcome this fear by remembering Chris’ words. “These authorities ain’t right.” When he gets into the computer lab, he tries to hack into Elijah’s hidden files once more, but he figures out by checking the download history that the computers all had their cyber security upgraded through software sent by a man under the account “ElijahEdwart.” Greg, just manages to, in 5 minutes get past it. Just before the period ends, he finds a file that notes the technical qualities of the Teddy Bear, and it has a note that the reason it can’t move fast is because several bugs that weren’t fixed before it was sent out made certain parts that make the wheels go fast not work. Afterward, with one minute to spare, Greg gets back to where recess is.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 30:

<p class="MsoNormal">At night, Aaron and Sofia play a game of chess by drawing in a sandy part of the board and moving by blowing on the spot where a chess piece previously was and drawing in its new location. Aaron makes moves impulsively and Sofia takes a long time to make each move. Aaron points out that if this were a real war, she wouldn’t have such time. Afterward, they go to sleep.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 31:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron and Sofia have woken up. They are eating breakfast when Sofia starts an argument with Aaron, as she was too tired to do so last night. She states that Aaron, solely on impulse, abandoned the plan. Aaron justifies this by stating that there was an unplanned factor. They get into a fierce argument. It ends with them deciding to settle this if it harms them again.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 32:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg is eating breakfast again. He asks to use the bathroom afterward, and goes to the computer room again. He is about to hack, but the cyber-security was upgraded again, presumably by Elijah. He is about to break past that, but then a video chat screen appears, and its messenger is Elijah. He is standing right outside the orphanage, and he states that he was sure Greg was going to hack, and that’s why he upgraded the cyber-security, and that he placed Greg in the orphanage because he had some business he had to attend to before he could get to “taking care of” Greg. Elijah walks into the computer room, able to determine Greg’s there from the background of Greg’s end of the chat footage.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 33:

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:.5in">Aaron and Sofia are now discussing the belt Aaron stole from that guard. He reveals that it has a note addressed to the belt’s owners. It says that the owner of the belt is about to, because she passed “security exams,” she’s going to be promoted to a “security designer   .” The note is from some group called “The Controllers.” They also find the ID card, which Aaron notes, has a woman who looks somewhat like Sofia, but with some notable differences. Aaron gets an idea: Since there’s a lot of run-down businesses around Green Hill, one may have makeup, which they could steal to disguise Sofia as the owner of the belt. Sofia agrees, and they she starts making a plan.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 34:

<p class="MsoNormal">A bit later, Sofia and Aaron have the makeup. Sofia has used it to create a disguise. They sneak over to where the note says to get the promotion. Sofia goes in while Aaron watches from the bushes. Sofia slips into the “traditional tour” where the hiring manager gives her, thinking she’s the new security designer, an overview of her job. Sofia tries to gather information. Meanwhile, while their on the front, Aaron notices Stan and his team are on a hill, with Stan aiming a sniper at Sofia. Aaron gets her out of the way just in time, and as they get up, it turns out Aaron knocked a good deal of Sofia’s makeup off, causing them both to be recognized. A fight breaks out. Sofia, at one point, when one of Stan’s team members is about to shoot her again, she takes too long trying to decide which move to make, forcing Aaron to save her again. Behind the cover of some desks, Aaron notices a discarded business card resulting from the chaos, that has the picture of someone and label that suggests their rank in the police department is high. Aaron runs into danger away from the cover, grabs the man in the picture, and threatens to kill him unless they say if there is any citizen listing that can tell them where Greg is. One police officer, not wanting the high-rank officer being held captive to die, opens up a computer and looks at the records. It states that as of yesterday, Greg was in an orphanage. Afterward, Aaron and Sofia, still holding the high-rank officer hostage, go away. Once they hide in an alley, they beat him up until he’s knocked out, and, through some stealth, carry him out onto the sidewalk for him to wake up.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 35:

<p class="MsoNormal">Sofia and Aaron get into yet another argument. Sofia criticizes how if Aaron were less impulsive, he could have thought up his plan before they went in and not almost get both of them killed. Aaron vehemently defends his actions, stating that she, on the other hand, wouldn’t have had to get saved if she didn’t take so long to decide which direction to go in when Stan’s team were trying to shoot her. The argument ends with them deciding to not involve each other in each other’s plans.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 36:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg is dragged by Elijah into a room in a heavily guarded mansion and placed in a room. Elijah shows him a laptop and tells him that since the Teddy Bear doesn’t move fast because various parts of it had bugs that made parts designed to make the wheels go faster malfunction, and that Greg is here to fix that. When Greg asks why not to just use the programmers who made it in the first place, and Elijah responds with “Yeeeaaah…they were killed by Byron”, explaining that if they were not killed by Byron’s troops, they could have fixed the bugs. Elijah then explains that they will chat through some radios, as knowing that Aaron and Sofia are in this city, he decides that they’re looking for Aaron’s son, and that they will assume that wherever Elijah is, Greg is. Lastly, Elijah explains that from Elijah’s end, Greg will hear a robotic voice because to hide his identity, Elijah only sends a robot he controls outside to run his errands.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 37:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron and Sofia, using the remaining makeup to disguise themselves, go to the orphanage. Sofia refuses to go with Aaron, though, as they agreed to not get involved with each other’s plans. After a few close calls where the woman they question almost figures out who Aaron is, he manage to manipulate out the information that Greg was adapted by Elijah. Aaron, because of the woman’s constant questions she throws at him, suspects she’s somehow involved with Elijah. Aaron tries to manipulate the information on where Greg may be, but the woman becomes aggressive, and states she’s going to contact the authorities. Aaron grabs her by the shirt and demands she tell them where they are, and she reveals that there’s an old building that was once an isolated ranch-style house, where the means of communicating with Greg is, but that she doesn’t know where Greg is. The woman, however, then escapes by biting Aaron and dashing away before she can catch up. Afterward, Aaron goes back to Sofia with the information they have, and he almost gets angry at Sofia for not helping, before remembering that they agreed to not have anything to do with each other.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 38:

<p class="MsoNormal">While Greg is typing at his computer, although he can’t hack the Teddy Bear because he needs a certain bit of software that laptop had called Twisted Code 2.0. (Which is a programming software) he gets an idea. However, there’s a guard watching him that could attack if he doesn’t continue typing or tries to go. Greg summons up all the courage he has, thinking of that line from Chris Boat again, and runs away from the computer, crawls in between the legs of the guard, gets into a chase around the room with him, which wounds up knocking him out, but attracting more guards inside. Greg takes the key of the knocked-out guard, escapes, unlocks the exit, and runs out. He goes into town, looks around, and finds a radio station, and breaks in. Greg sneaks around, finds an empty radio set, and starts it up, looking around occasionally in case he alerted anyone. Afterward, he finds the speaker in the radio set and broadcasts on numerous frequencies and tells people of the terrible things Elijah has done: Kidnapping, starting wars, and building big mansions while the rest of his population lives like dirt. It occurs to Greg that no one will believe him. So when a crowd guards come in ready to strike, Greg, with some persuasion, convinces some of them that they are on the wrong side, causing the side to break into chaos between the loyal guards and defective guards. The defectives win, and they back up Greg on this. Afterward, a backup of guards come in, and before they can be convinced, they are dragged away.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 39:

<p class="MsoNormal">Greg is taken back to the mansion, and Elijah is furious. He consults his security designers, who give various ideas on how to secure Greg, which he combines, and then asks how long it will take to build this new security. They state that they could use their experimental 3D printing technology from their science labs to build it incredibly quickly, as in, in only 20 minutes.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 40:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron and Sofia are walking to the building Aaron learned about. 25 minutes later, they get there. They find that it is filled with traps. Some traps work well for Sofia’s strategy, others for Aaron’s strength and reflexes, but with traps seemingly designed for the other almost kill them. Eventually, they get close enough to the end to see a radio. Meanwhile, Greg is typing, with the radio next to him, but he can’t reach it for an unknown reason. He whispers into it-when a guard in his room leaves because he’s off his shift-to see if someone besides Elijah is one the other end. When Aaron and Sofia get to the radio, Aaron is sure he faintly hears Greg’s voice through thick static, but they can’t adjust the dial because it is rigged so that you have to enter a passcode first. Afterward, a robot comes, deactivating traps with his presence. Sofia gets an idea: If it deactivated the traps, could it get past the radio’s passcode. They are about to push it forward, but it begins to retreat, as it is being controlled by Elijah, aware of what their trying to do. As they run for it, Stan’s army come in to attack. Aaron pieces together that the woman at the orphanage, after she escaped, alerted Stan. As Sofia and Aaron run after the robot and away from Stan’s army, both of their weaknesses from unbalanced skills sets harm them, almost killing Aaron and causing Sofia to be shot. Aaron, angered by this, turns toward Stan and his army, and kills every single one of them, then he catches up with the robot and disables its wheels. Afterward, he goes to talk to Sofia, who reveals what made her so strategic and not particularly quick for all this time. She explains that when she was a US general, she was captured after a few years by North Korea during the Fog War. She tried to use a radio to send for help, along with revealing what secrets she learned from being trapped in North Korea, but a long time later, she learned that the message got distorted, causing numerous words to be taken out of context, making a request for help interpereted as a threat from North Korea to launch nukes, causing USA to launch counternukes, creating a full-on nuclear war that damaged the ozone layer and caused society to collapse. As a result, Sofia is sure that if she screws up again, she could cause a disaster like this again. Back to the present, Aaron, knowing that they both almost got killed, gets a self-revelation that one must balance physical strength and reflexes with strategy. Sofia then dies. Aaron brings what’s left of the passcode toward the radio and it opens it. He talks with Greg, who reveals where he is and that it is heavily guarded, but before he can say more, the voice of a guard is heard and the line goes dead.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 41:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron makes his way to the place Greg talked about. It is heavily guarded. Aaron makes some observations to determine how to get in, finds the part which appears to be the least guarded, and gets in. Afterward, Aaron peaks through the keyhole of numerous doors while running from the guards, until he finds the one Greg is in, and beats the few guards around him, then uses his undershirt to tie the door behind him shut. Afterward, Greg reveals why Elijah held onto Greg after the kidnapping  , and that he has been equipped with a new laptop that has a bomb implanted in it, and it will go off if Greg breaks the computer, spends too long not typing, or types in too many coding errors. Also, Greg explains that his computer came with a pair of shackles shaped like gloves that can do nothing but type. Lastly, Greg reveals some shocking news: The Teddy Bear could destroy the remainder of the ozone layer, potentially dooming the surface and all its inhabitants. Aaron, observing slight spool flaws in the computer, wonders why those aren’t setting off the bomb, and decides that it is because they are small, and that if he can gradually chip away at them, he can find the bomb and diffuse it. Afterward, the guards break down the door and Aaron tries to fend them off, but is forced to go soft on them in order to avoid causing a disturbance in the room that could causes Greg’s computer to fall, break, and detonate. As a result, some of the guards manage to get Aaron caught.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 42:

<p class="MsoNormal">Aaron is taken to a bedroom in the same building. Afterward, Elijah comes in, who came here when the radio got “invaded” by Aaron and after attending to some “business.” Additionally, Elijah explains that The Controllers are composed of him and his guards and are designed to maximize profits by rebuilding civilization in the form of a settlement that favors them and eliminating all other settlements as to avoid anyone other settlement potentially taking over and regulating the system he made. Afterward, Elijah reveals that Midnight Light was abandoned because they now that the Teddy Bear was launched, the sole purpose of the town was over, and they didn’t need the refugees that came there to know about Green Hill, as well, which started with people who were in one of the deepest subways in the world-made by the company “The Organic Branch”-when the bombs of the Fog War were blocked, and they chip away at the walls, expanding into a vast city, which Elijah took control of, as he was that subway as well, about to commit suicide. Additionally, Elijah tries to justify his actions   and talks about reports from his spies of Green Farm, stating that just like they have similar names, they both value the few instead of the many. Aaron says that that is a ridiculous accusation, since they were kind enough to let him and his adapted son Greg in when they were on the brink of death in the aftermath of the Fog War, and that the so-called favor of the few instead of the many is just those who work hard being rewarded.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 43:

<p class="MsoNormal">Back at Aaron’s home of Green Farm, outside of Byron’s mansion, numerous people, who clearly are poor, are protesting against their low wages. Byron is alerted by one of his advisors on this issue, and he states that if they are just told that this system is designed to favor those who work hard, they’ll stop protesting and go back to their life. Afterward, Byron is alerted by another advisor that the search parties had disappeared. In response, Byron decides to not send anyone, but to use what remaining troops they have to fortify the borders in case Elijah comes.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 44:

<p class="MsoNormal">In response to Aaron’s excuse for Byron, Elijah states that he’s looked through the numerous spy reports over the past year and noticed that civilians, including the poor, put in massive amount of work into their job, but almost all of them are poor if you notice the clothing they wear and the nature of their houses. Aaron, defeated, looks around and starts his escape. He distracts Elijah that pointing out the chess set on his bed and criticizing how the side facing him is in a position to sacrifice more of the pawns. When Elijah is distracted and looking at the chess set, Aaron breaks free and runs to where Greg was. When he isn’t there, he fights his way outside and finds that Elijah’s “business” from earlier was helping Greg get into a truck that is now taking off. Since it is just taking off, Aaron just manages to catch up with it and jumps inside. Aaron fights the people inside, stops the truck, and slowly dissects the computer until finally, he finds the bomb, which he defuses. By this point, a crowd has gathered around the two. One of the crowd members points out that Greg was the person he saw run into the radio station, shortly before the anti-Elijah broadcast began. Afterward, Aaron asks Greg if he can use his laptop to hack the Teddy Bear so it explodes like he was planning to do earlier. Greg reveals that he will need some software that this computer doesn’t have, and the computer broke from the dissection required to get to the bomb. A boy in the crowd offers help, runs away for a few minutes, then comes back with his laptop, which has been off for years as it only has 5 percent left, and it has tons of software, including Twisted Code 2.0, which Greg uses to destroy the Teddy Bear for good.

<p class="MsoNormal">Scene 45:

<p class="MsoNormal">Elijah and his guards finally catch up the crowd. The crowd stars at Elijah, then they begin to demand answers as to the nature of what the radio said he did. Elijah tries to deny this, but Greg breaks free of the shackle-gloves of the computer and dashes to where Elijah is, and Aaron is unable to get through the crowd to him. Greg announces to Elijah that he is no longer afraid of him, and after he launches the accusation of Elijah’s crimes again. Afterward, several former guards from the crowd come forward to testify, causing most of Elijah’s remaining guards to turning against him and chase him, until they catch him, and beat him, presumably to death. After that, Aaron states that although Elijah was terrible, he did help Aaron wake up to how much of a hypocrite he has been for helping Byron, as he very close in terms of his morals to Elijah, and as a result, Aaron states, he will stay here and help concoct a new system now that Elijah is out of power, and it will be one that favors the many instead of the few. As the word spreads across Green Hill, Aaron reveals the full story to his adapted son, Greg, on what made him so impulsive, even outside of this mission. It was because when he was a kid, he caused the collapse of his mother's big clothing manufacturing business. He did so because he cheated on a test at school, and this was devastating for the business because the fact that he did so spread through word-of-the-mouth, starting with one of Aaron's friends, and that was a problem for the mother, as one primary source of profits in her company was from making and selling uniforms for schools, and the fact that the owner of the business had her own son cheat on an exam made her look like a hypocrite for trying to help schools, causing many schools that got their uniforms from her to cut off connections with her, eventually forcing the company into closure. This put intense financial strain on the family, which led to tension in between the two parents, resulting in a divorce. Aaron stayed with the dad, who, blaming him for this disaster, became a horrible father, refusing to let him go outside, and gaslighted him if he said that being forced to stay inside was unfair. Frustrated over this, Aaron began plotting elaborate escapes, all of which ended in failure. Then, after one exceptionally complicated plan failed, Aaron snapped over it not working and using physical strength, knocked out his father, took the key, and escaped. After getting out, Aaron thought, "What is the use of excessive strategy? After all, it didn't help me back then."

<p class="MsoCommentText"> <p class="MsoCommentText">   Remember, Greg will repeat this line when in one of the final scenes, he reveals that he has now fully overcome his fear. <p class="MsoCommentText">   Before she goes out, make them both mention in passing that they both served in the military in the past. <p class="MsoCommentText">   In this scene, reveal in passing that Sofia had eccentric parents and Aaron was in a single-parent household, and that Aaron was considering becoming a boxer, but the war broke out before he could do that, while Sofia was a military general who joined because she hated the rival of the Fog War, North Korea, with a passion. <p class="MsoCommentText">   Before she goes in, make them both mention in passing family relationships. Remember, Aaron is a man unlucky in terms of his love life with Greg as an adapted kid and Sofia never really tried anything to do with marriage or having a family. <p class="MsoCommentText">   Remember, this profession, in the town of Green Hill, is where one designs systems to secure something. One of these people will design the elaborate system designed to trap Greg. <p class="MsoCommentText">   As they walk, they talk a bit, and we learn that Aaron has had an abusive dad and his mom died. When Sofia inquires what they did for a living, Aaron states that his mother ran a clothing shop, and that his dad did a bunch of odd jobs around the neighborhood. <p class="MsoCommentText">   The reason Elijah first used Greg to force the troops into combat was because he didn’t think that he’d have to use the Teddy Bear, since it was expected to, due to the thinness of the material it was made of, break down after just one extended use, and he chose Greg because a while ago, some hacking through some of Elijah’s now dead programmers’ hacking revealed that Greg was the son of a high power general. <p class="MsoCommentText">   The backstory Elijah uses is that when he was known as Markus Patrick, he tried to be a charitable man in past, even when his oil company made him rich, but when 26 “internet trolls” spread false rumors about him being a sexual offender, his reputation was ruined. Angry and defeated, after unsuccessful attempts to restore his reputation by explaining himself online, he decided to kill himself by jumping in front of a train, but the nuclear bombs on the surface interrupted him, making him miss the train he was going to use. Not another train came. After learning about the surface, he had the idea that if he could rebuild this society from the subway and become its leader, he could be known as a different person with a better reputation, so he invented his new name and made Green Hill, taking in refugees for a while until he started the Midnight Light project. He wanted to destroy other settlements because if an opposition had power, they could create another story to damage Markus’ new identity, so he vowed to destroy all other settlements.

<p class="MsoCommentText"> Creeper50 (talk) 19:27, April 4, 2017 (UTC)Creeper50