SOG Armaggedon (Boy It Tickles Edition)

In a world where taxis are expensive and people prefer to take the bus an evil wizard plans to conquer the world, his name is Ganon, by traveling through time and kidnapping every single evil figure in history he plans to combine them all into the most powerful evil being ever seen on this side of the Detroit river.

I'm Bo Jackson, and this...is my story.

The SOG was on vacations in a tropical island, Viper the transformer was on a hammock with sunglasses on and a cocky grin on his face:

"Hey scary, care to spread suntan oil on my chassis?"

"Sorry Viper but I'm building a sandcastle" Said Scary the small happy tree, she stood there all happy with a kiddy bucket and shovel but since she was a tree she could not use them but she was still like :D "Lalalala~"

Mandalore the devilish orange furry cat was munching some cookies next to Scary scratching his back on her branches from time to time. 

Flaky and Tyrin were cuddling on a hammock all ^///^ with the wind rocking the hammock softly.

Dusty was too busy chasing after a crab, she was pretty hungry and she had heard that sea food is tasty.

Bree was happily drawing under a palm tree.

Areis was swimming happily in the sea.

Col.Sexypants he was ZE MEDIC and he was dissecting some sea life FOR ZE SCIENCE.

 Rockyz was the hooded guy made out of rock, like every rock, he was taking a nice sunbath next to other rock buddies

Babylon the Vietnam veteran was sitting on his wheelchair with his old army clothes as always and packing a huge arsenal on his wheelchair but this time he was taking a sunbath while caressing his long grey veteran beard, did I tell you he was in NAM?.

Sshaken was training his punching and kicking at the beach with the others.

Marcus Death itself was practicing his limbo skills with his scythe.

<p class="MsoNormal">Ruby the espeon and unknown the umbreon were chasing each other happily.

<p class="MsoNormal">Nipples The enchilada the good looking echidna was rubbing suntan lotion on his nipples with cool sunglasses on.

<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:11.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language: EN-US;mso-bidi-language:AR-SA">Meds the ninja, was feet deep in the water wearing a bikini and his ninja clothes underneath trying to pick up chicks "I'm looking SMOKEY!" and his best bud Jerry Cool the yellow dinosaur  was lying down on a hammock wearing a sombrero and sunglasses "Yes, yes meds, keep playing near the sharks..."

<p class="MsoNormal">Everything was fine until a time traveling lord came from the sky and crash-landed in the sea, his lifeless body floated to the shore everyone gathered around the body and in his last breath he said:

<p class="MsoNormal">"I...i...HAVE SOME TEA YOU BRITISH PIECE OF CRAP..." then tossed hot boiling tea at Flaky's face:

<p class="MsoNormal">"AAAAAARGH!! IM NOT EVEN BRITISH! GOD IT BURNS!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Quick Meds fill Scary's bucket with water!" said Tyrin since Meds was the closest to it, Meds nodded and picked the bucket, seconds later he tossed the content of it at Flaky's face, which it was sand.

<p class="MsoNormal">"MY EYES!!!" he screamed out when the sand hit his eyes "MY BEAUTIFUL EYES!" everyone glared at Meds, Meds slowly backed away with an Oops expression.

<p class="MsoNormal">While Tyrin helped Flaky to clean his face everyone else listened to what the timelord had to say:

<p class="MsoNormal">"So...like yeah, there is this dude named Ganon or somethin' and he is being a super prick, like, he goes around time like he thinks he is the boss and me and the other timelords were like, he is such a bitch, like totally a bitch, we even saw him smoking weed and making out with the captain of the football team behind the gym and we were like, NO WAY, so yeah he is a dick, and I heard you guys could do such job A team..."

<p class="MsoNormal">Bree raised an eyebrow "Ehm...we are the SOG team, not the A team"

<p class="MsoNormal">The timelord looked at the rest of the team "well fuck me..." then exploded into gibs.

<p class="MsoNormal">"....CAN I EAT HIM?" wondered Dusty

<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:11.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language: EN-US;mso-bidi-language:AR-SA"><span style="font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">"Well..." Bree said as she squeezed all the blood off her hair "I guess you can, but it seems we have a job in our hands..."

"DAMN COMMIES ARE BEHIND THIS!" Babylon snapped and began to shoot his machinegun in the air "Save the ammo grampa" laughed Sshaken "I was getting bored of so much nothing to do..." he cracked his knuckles.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Do you think mister timelord is okay?" wondered scary innocently

<p class="MsoNormal">"MMMM...i can't feel ZE pulse so my diagnostic is that he's got a severe case of constipation...and ZE aids" said Sexypants.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Your diagnostic is always aids Sexypants" Marcus chuckled.

<p class="MsoNormal">"But is he going to be okay?" Scary looked sad, Mandalore licked one of the Timelords gibs as a way of showing scary he was taking care of mister timelord.

<p class="MsoNormal">"GUYS! MY NIPPLES DETECT SOME NEARBY DANGER! AND MY NIPPLES ARE POINTING WHERE..." indeed, his nipples pointed north

<p class="MsoNormal">"Alright team" Viper loaded his minigun "TIME TO KICK BUTT"

<p class="MsoNormal">Unknown picked up the scent of a nearby enemy's crotches "Guys! AMBUSH!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Indeed it was an ambush

<p class="MsoNormal">"INVISIBLE NINJAS!" Meds screamed

<p class="MsoNormal">COMERCIAL BREAK:

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER! BUY IT TODAY

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER! BUY IT TODAY

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER! BUY IT TODAY

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER! BUY IT TODAY

<p class="MsoNormal">-Buzz-

<p class="MsoNormal">Hi I'm a lawyer...and with my services i can sue anyone for a decent amount of money, in fact, I'm going to sue you, you fag-

<p class="MsoNormal">BACK TO OUR REGULAR PROGRAMMING:

<p class="MsoNormal">"Wait...how do you know they are invisible ninjas?" asked Bree

<p class="MsoNormal">"A mother knows these things" Meds answered

<p class="MsoNormal">"But you are a guy and do not even have-" Bree was suddenly kicked in the face by an invisible ninja.

<p class="MsoNormal">"We are surrounded!" Rocky yelled

<p class="MsoNormal">"We can take em! GO TEAM!" Ruby said, Areis flied out of the water and shot a huge beam of ultimate delphiness at the ninjas, Ruby used her psychic pokemon powers to make their heads explode, while Viper shot them down with his minigun, Unknown would bite their heads and rip them off one by one,  if a ninja got too close he would grab their necks and shove em in the ground "EAT SOME!!!" Sexypants would saw them open with medical tools "THIS WILL STING A LOT!" Meds rode his dinosaur buddy Jerry, Jerry would eat any nearby ninja "WOOOHOOO!!" Dusty would hide under the sand and pop up behind them and eat them like a shark, but in sand, Sshaken would melee them ninjas punched their faces in and shoving his feet up their butts, Flaky and Tyrin turned into Flaryn and cut through them with his sword hands like butter between 2 sweaty manboobs, Scary and Mandalore were just sitting there, Mandalore licking his fluffy  arm and Scary all "Lalala~" Rocky would turn them into pulp with his heavy rock fists "ROCK ON!", Marcus would chop em to bits with his scythe and then cut the souls apart.

<p class="MsoNormal">Once they were done they got on the SOG's Van (A black ford van with the word Candy crudely painted on the sides, it was Bree's idea) and flied away into the past because their van is...ehm...MAGIC!

<p class="MsoNormal">They went to Germany during WW2 they managed to follow the trace of Gannon thanks to Ruby's psychic powers.

<p class="MsoNormal">"THIS IS BACK WHERE ALL COMMIES WERE KNOWN AS NAZIS!" Babylon loaded his machinegun

<p class="MsoNormal"> Sshaken then added "Well, this is interesting, i can't wait to bust up some tanks with my BARE HANDS!!! GRRRRR IM SO BADASS!!!" he ripped off his shirt

<p class="MsoNormal">"You call that badass? HAH! LEARN FROM THE MASTER!" Nipples took off his shirt, wait...he never wears shirts "MY SKIN!!! MY NIPPLES!" he just ripped off his skin, Sexypants wrapped an arm around Nipples neck and whispered in his ear "I will fix you up" then licked his ear sexually, because I promised hardcore sex (After 2 John Woo directed hot hardcore sex scenes with explosions and Nicholas Cage's left butt cheek cameo later)

<p class="MsoNormal">Once there they made their way to Hitler's home, it was easy to find because of the big sign that said "HITLER'S HOUSE! GO GET A PICTURE WITH HIM AND HIS NEPHEW HANS! HE IS 9! HE IS COOL!" Once inside they met with Hitler, he was a total gangsta *cough* wigger *cough*

<p class="MsoNormal">"Who dares to see ZE hitlar? biach i am the Z of NAZI, word yo" said Hitler as he put his cap backwards

<p class="MsoNormal">Viper in a robotic fashion said "COME WITH ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE!"

<p class="MsoNormal">" I will only go if zat sexy girl comes with me" he winked at Dusty and then wiggled his tongue at her for 5 uncomfortable minutes.

<p class="MsoNormal">".........Can I eat him?" Dusty wondered

<p class="MsoNormal">"Umm...since I am the only one sane enough to establish a conversation, I think is best you come with us a big threat is coming to this era and we must stop it at all costs"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Pliz mister Hitler, come with us and I will hug you" said Scary, Mandalore nodded ^w^

<p class="MsoNormal">"ZE TREE JUST SPOKE! WHAT KIND OF WITCHERY IS DIZ!" Hitler panicked

<p class="MsoNormal">"HAVE SOME TEA YOU NAZI PIECE OF CRAP" Unknown threw hot boiling tea at Hitler's face for some reason.

<p class="MsoNormal">Hitler screamed in pain and suddenly turned into SwagHitler (Why such monstrosity? Because Bree is evil and has purple hair and she hates Ravio, I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN THAT BREE!) Swaghitler shot a SEIGFEIL LAZ0R at the Sog team, Nipples shot a shield that protected the team from the laz0r, they all then charged:

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;font-size:11pt;line-height:115%;">Rocky fisted Hitler in the face forcing Hitler to scream in pain "SEIG FEEEEEEEEEEIIIIL!" <span style="font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;font-size:11pt;line-height:115%;">  <span style="font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;font-size:11pt;line-height:115%;">Marcus shoved his scythe up his ass and twisted it so fast that made a black hole out of Hitler's anus  that sucked his the skin off his face, once the black hole close, Hitler was on his knees with his skinless face "SEIG FEEEEEEEIIIIIL!!!" Babylon shoved a grenade up hitler's bellybutton "DIE YOU NAZI COMMIE!" and it exploded, Ruby filled Hitler's brain with Justin Bieber and commercials for taco bell all of Hitler's insides were all over the place  Flaryn bitched slapped Hitler's head so hard that it spinned like crazy, Areis bit off Hitler's crotch, Sexypants then shoved a huge needle up his mouth and injected him with Aids type cancer "NOW I AM ZE NEW HITLAR!" chuckled Sexypants, Hitler then exploded into gibs, Meds then threw a plastic bottle at Hitler's rests "DIE YOU MONSTER! I SAVED THE DAY! WOOOHOOOO" Jerry clapped sarcastically at Meds, while Dusty ate the rests.

<p class="MsoNormal">"Ummm...guys...we had to rescue Hitler, not kill him...now we have changed history..." said Bree = - =U

<p class="MsoNormal">"Really?" Areis already created a new Reich movement all about dolphins, he was now rocking a cool dictator hat "Oh well...HAIL DOLPHIN!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Rocky rubbed the back of his head "Well...where to now?"

<p class="MsoNormal">Meds snapped his fingers "I KNOW! FOLLOW ME!" ran into a wall "MY NOSE!!!!" he squirmed on the ground in pain, Scary was all like "Awww more Meds...lemme hug you..." remember that Scary was a little tree so she dropped herself right on his face "MY FACE!!!" then it combusted on fire "ooooh how did that happen?" wondered Scary :o Mandalore licked the now burnt and skinless Med's face:

<p class="MsoNormal">"Sorry guys, I was too busy taking a robopiss I saw how you burned Hitler's face how did that go?- OH CRAP" he saw Med's burnt face and though it was Hitler, he charged at him and began to punch the F out of his wimpy face "DIE! DIE! DIE!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"OUWCH! OW AAAAIEEEEH SOMEONE! HELP ME! OUWCH OW ARK" Meds screamed out in pain

<p class="MsoNormal">"Should we help him?" Ruby wondered

<p class="MsoNormal">"OUWCH HELP ME!!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"We should but...there is a mandatory dancing and singing scene now" Unknown said

<p class="MsoNormal">And so they danced: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iIkXPwS3-rI

<p class="MsoNormal">"OUWCH! HELP! HE IS MURDERING THE SHIT OUT ME!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Commercial BREAK!!! *crack* "MY LEG!!!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Some words from our sponsor:

<p class="MsoNormal">I want your fucking money! ALA IS GOD ALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALAAAA *BOOM*

<p class="MsoNormal">Back to our regular programming:

<p class="MsoNormal">We see our team flying through the air in the team van:

<p class="MsoNormal">"So where is Ganon heading to now?" Unknown asked to Ruby, Ruby closed her eyes and used her psychic powers

<p class="MsoNormal">"MMM...I...see Ganon...plastic bag...self erotic asphyxiation...crotch less latex panties...cheerios..."

<p class="MsoNormal">"MICHAEL JACKSON'S HOUSE!" Nipples said

<p class="MsoNormal">"Which Michael Jackson?" asked Areis asked

<p class="MsoNormal">"Child molesting white one" responded Ruby

<p class="MsoNormal">"GOT IT!" Viper who was driving the van headed back in time to the 90s at the Neverland ranch. Once there the Van landed and they all made their way to the ranch:

<p class="MsoNormal">"You think Michael Jackson is there? Marcus asked

<p class="MsoNormal">"If he is there it's time to show the king of pop how the sog wiki...pops...eh...yeah" loaded his minigun

<p class="MsoNormal">"WEAAAAAAK" Meds added while riding his dino buddy, Viper turned to him "Say it again and i will feed you to Michael Jackson..." Meds pointed at his skinless burnt face "I don't think Michael would dig this new look you gave me, asswipe"

<p class="MsoNormal">"You 2 stop it we are already here and this time let's try not to kill him, we need him alive" Bree said

<p class="MsoNormal">Bree blasted the door open with her blaster, and inside Michael Jackson was sitting on a throne "I have been waiting for you SOG team...HEEHEE YEAOUW" he began to dance as he spoke "I have heard of Ganon YEAH! OW CMON BABY and I'm willing to come with ya" he grabbed his crotch

<p class="MsoNormal">"HE IS A MONSTER!!! KILL HIIIIIIM!!!" Meds screamed

<p class="MsoNormal">Michael Jackson got up "WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?" he ripped off his crotch showing that inside there was a white glowing light "BEEEEEEAAAAAAM!!!!" and a white beam of ultimate robot crotch shot towards the SOG team, Nipples pressed his nipples together and created a shield that protected everyone, after that blast Mandalore ran up to Michael and shoved himself in the crotch, Michael shook and clutched in pain, then suddenly Michael's head exploded and Mandalore's head popped up, his eyes were blank, he was now in control of whatever being lived inside Michael:

<p class="MsoNormal">"WE HAVE TO SAVE HIM!" Scary yelled out to the team

<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size:11.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language: EN-US;mso-bidi-language:AR-SA">"Don't worry! I GOT IT!" Rockyz rock hand grew into a giant rock hand and punched Michael's body out of the mansion, Michael's body landed in the backyard, but he was intact and so was Mandalore that had absorbed Michael's power and now was as strong as him, the SOG team made their way to the backyard and they saw that the backyard was a circus filled with ULTIMATE CLOWS OF AWESOME DESTRUCTION!!!

"Prepare to be CLOWNIFIED!!!!" one of the Clowns said to our heroes as he charged with his claw like hands, "CLOWN THIS!!!" Viper punched the clown in the face so hard that the red became part of the clown's skull, then Flaryn proceeded to cut the clown into pieces, but suddendly all the other clowns attacked led by MandaJackson, Babylon pressed a button on his wheelchair and 2 huge engines came from the back of his wheelchair, unknown hopped on the wheelchair and both took off and LUDICROUS SPEED towards Mandajackson while the team fought the clowns, Dusty used her special move LAWNMOWER GIRL and like a lawnmower she got on her 4 with her mouth wide opened while  Sshaken grabbed her 2 legs and pushed her around like a cart, every clown in their path would be eaten, Areis would shift into a huge dolphin dragon...WITH A FLAMETHROWER and would burn them into a crisp, Viper would use his special ability where his hands turned into Gatling guns and would shot all the clowns around him into pulp, Nipples's nipples would turn into rocket launcher that launched milk rockets every clown hit by one of them would melt "MILK! MY WEAKNESS!!" Sexypants pulled out a huge bone saw and swinged it around like a sword chopping heads off like no other, Ruby used her powers to lift the clowns around her in the air making it easier for Sexypants to chop them, Bree though that the clowns were too many for them and so she called reinforcements and from the sky a ball of fur flied down onto the battleground then that small furball would spin around running over as much clowns as it could, Meds rode Jerry through the battlefield, Jerry would shove any clowns in the way into his mouth.

<p class="MsoNormal">Meanwhile Babylon and Unknown chased MandaJackson into a tent, inside a show was going on, a magician pulled out a bunny out of a hat all the kids watching clapped at the magician:

<p class="MsoNormal">"COMMIE WITCHERY!" Babylon shot the magician full of bullets even when the magician was dead Babylon would not shooting at the dead body all the kids watched shocked:

<p class="MsoNormal">"HE IS ALREADY DEAD! HE IS ALREADY DEAAAAD!!" one kid cried

<p class="MsoNormal">Unknown meanwhile was looking for Mandajackson and he sound found him in the backstage:

<p class="MsoNormal">"GIVE US BACK MANDALORE!" a voice inside of Michael's body responded "BITE ME!" Unknown did just that and bit the chest right off revealing a small British phallic alien inside, the alien tossed its tea at Unknown's face and tried to run away, meanwhile outside the SOG team stood on top of a mountain of dead clowns in victory, that furball that helped was none other than Crazycya:

<p class="MsoNormal">"Hey guys, seems I'm late to the party" Crazycya said

<p class="MsoNormal">Commercial break:

<p class="MsoNormal">*A man in a fancy suit in front of a white background stares at the camera*

<p class="MsoNormal">We live in a dangerous world, and we are constantly reminded that insurance is a great way to keep yourself and your loved ones protected...Just think of all the things that could happen to you on a normal day, a car crash, an illness, your son turning emo and killing himself, aids, Tom Cruise haunting you every time you go to the bathroom...That's why you should have insurance...so call 555-U-ARE-AN-EMO

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<p class="MsoNormal">Back to our regular program

<p class="MsoNormal">The small phallic alien was making its escape when suddenly it was intercepted by Scary, she knew of the danger Mandalore was in and she had turned into her monster form, she was a big tree monster with huge claw like hands, she stepped on the alien turning it into pulp, she then pulled out Mandalore out of Michael's body hugging the small kitty in her arms, Mandalore was well again.

<p class="MsoNormal">Everyone was like  YAAAAAAY for about 5.0 seconds before moving on.

<p class="MsoNormal">And NOW mandatory singing and dancing scene sponsored by:

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER

<p class="MsoNormal">and

<p class="MsoNormal">"PIECE OF CRAP" BRITISH TEA

<p class="MsoNormal">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYwiwbgMusY

<p class="MsoNormal">Author's note: Thank me later, I still got  10000 fucking pages to write left.

<p class="MsoNormal">After that, the team went back into the van Ruby used her powers once again:

<p class="MsoNormal">"...I see...a fat man...wearing a bra...a Nicholas Cage movie...tons of dildos...and a cup filled with chocolate fudge...wait...that is not chocolate-"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Justin Bieber's house!" Viper said "QUICK AREIS! DRIVE US THERE"

<p class="MsoNormal">"But I don't have hands...only flippers" Meds pointed a ninja gun at Areis "Drive us there and stop by the mall, I want new shoes"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Meds stop pointing guns at people you are not a badass" Flaryn said

<p class="MsoNormal">"But i wanna be..." his eyes teared one tear rolled down his burnt cheek and boy did it burn  "FUUUUUUUUUUU"

<p class="MsoNormal">The team drove to Justin's house on the way there the fusion between Flaky and Tyrin ended:

<p class="MsoNormal">"Awww...I miss the fuzzy feeling I get when I'm inside flaky" ; ~ ;

<p class="MsoNormal">Meds laughed "HAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHA...SEX JOKE! HAHAHAHAAHAHA" he teared from so much laughing "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAIAAAA"

<p class="MsoNormal">"We are here!" said Areis

<p class="MsoNormal">"Well that was fast, nice driving Areis" Congratulated  Sshaken

<p class="MsoNormal">"Eh...remember that I have flippers?"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Fappers?" wondered Meds

<p class="MsoNormal">Then the van crashed in Justin's house and both the Van and the house exploded in slow motion in 45 different angles

<p class="MsoNormal">Commercial Break

<p class="MsoNormal">Today we are going to interview random people in the street to see what they think of the new brand of detergent:

<p class="MsoNormal">"What do you think of it mam'?"

<p class="MsoNormal">"It's pretty good and it smells pretty good"

<p class="MsoNormal">"And you sir?"

<p class="MsoNormal">"I like to put my weenier between my legs and act like I'm a dominatrix called Sarah"

<p class="MsoNormal">Back to our program:

<p class="MsoNormal">We meet our heroes stranded in Justin Bieber's funhouse of doom:

<p class="MsoNormal">"It will take a while to fix the van, in the meantime try to find him" Viper then proceeded to fix it, since he was a transformer he knew about tech, he opened the lid and checked the engine, once his hands were on the engine he gave the car a sensual smirk "Let daddy do his thing" he grabbed a wrench and began to unscrew the engine "OH baby oh ah oh aaaah~"

<p class="MsoNormal">Meds turned to Viper and watched o 3 o, Bree poked his shoulder "forget it Meds" = - =

<p class="MsoNormal">Rockyz saw a sign that said "Justin Bieber's Chamber of ultimate pleasure" and proceeded to walk in because yes, the door behind him closed shut, he was suddenly surrounded by robotic fangirls, his fists grew huge and proceeded to punch them all into robot bits, but they were too much "SHIT! HELP!...guess I will have to use my secret power, he pulled out a guitar from his pants "Time to rock on..." he then began to beat the robots with it, what? you expected him to play music?

<p class="MsoNormal">The door behind his was blast open by Bree's blaster, Sshaken jumped in and while in the air he spinned creating a mini tornado that sucked all those robots and then Bree shot a huge blast into the tornado that made it explode

<p class="MsoNormal">"OAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH~" Viper's moaning could be heard through the whole house and then a river of oil filled the hallways.

<p class="MsoNormal">After some uncomfortable cleaning they found Justin's chamber of fabulousness:

<p class="MsoNormal">"Get ready team...this is it" Areis said before he shot a beam that blew up the doors of the chamber

<p class="MsoNormal">The chamber was huge and in the very middle there was a throne sitting on it was...Abraham Lincoln. Lincoln slowly got up, he pointed a finger at them and said in an ominous voice:

<p class="MsoNormal">"HAVE SOME TEA-" Flaky had a flashback of all the times he had tea thrown at his face, he raged and charged at the former president "RYAAAAAAAAARGH!!!" a force field surrounded the president and Flaky was tossed back by it:

<p class="MsoNormal">"Urgh...DAMMIT!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Shit, how are we going to get through?" Marcus said before having an idea, with his scythe he cut through reality itself creating a portal that only he could go through, he went through it ending up at the other side of the force field right in front of Lincoln. Marcus shoved his scythe right through Lincoln's chest, Lincoln seemed to not really care about that, he opened his mouth and a kitty came out of it:

<p class="MsoNormal">"MEW" the kitty exploded Marcus was knocked out, the team had to do something to rescue Marcus from the grasp of the evil former president. Then Bieber popped from behind the throne, he stood next to Lincoln, Lincoln squeezed Bieber's left butt cheek and then French kissed the pop star.

<p class="MsoNormal">Everyone watched in shock, Viper came into the chamber "Hey guys what did i mi- OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-" his head exploded but it was quickly replaced with a spare one "-OOOOOOOOOD"

<p class="MsoNormal">Sshaken was tired of such random shit, he began to punch the force field "CMON! BREAK DAMMIT!" but it was impossible to break, Nipples shot a super mega laz0r from his nipples to break the force field but it was again impossible, Tyrin had an idea, he popped next to Flaky and said:

<p class="MsoNormal">"Hey look!" ^///^

<p class="MsoNormal">"Look what?" Flaky looked at Tyrin and saw that Tyrin had grown boobs out of nowhere again O-O his nose bled like a hose so hard  that it sent him flying towards the force field so hard that it broke it. Once the Force field was broken down the SOG team made their attack and to save Marcus.

<p class="MsoNormal">Viper shoved his machinegun in Lincoln's mouth and fired it, all of the former president's brains painted the room red with rainbows killing him, the bullets went through the president's skull and hit Bieber in the face turning it into a mess of loose skin and meat hanging from the face, Sshaken punched the singer so hard in the jaw that it exploded, Crazycya turned into his furry ball form and flied right through the singer's chest, Tyrin sat on Flaky's shoulders, Flaky did a back flip with a perfect landing on Bieber's crotch, Areis summoned an army of mini ninja flying dolphins that ripped open his chest, then Dusty proceeded to eat the intestines like spaghetti, Col.Sexypants diagnosed Bieber with aids "YOU HAVE ZE AIDS" Bieber's head exploded, Rockyz ripped off his legs and began to play the drums with them, Ruby summoned Nic Cage with a gun, Nic shot Bieber in the face, Unknown tail whipped Bieber so hard that he spinned without control like a tornado, Babylon shot a rocket launcher at Bieber while he was spinning and soon enough everything was covered in his blood Meds and Jerry watched "I WANNA TRY!" said meds but he slipped on the blood and fell on his back "....HAVE SOME TEA!" threw tea on his own eyes "MY EYES!!!" Jerry rolled his eyes, meanwhile Mandalore and Scary were at the van listening to happy songs :D both sitting on the driver's seat, Mandalore wanted to drive like a human > w < he placed his lil paws on the steering wheel, one of his paws slipped landing on the car keys twisting them starting the engine, the van began to move.

<p class="MsoNormal">Commercial Break:

<p class="MsoNormal">Hi, I'm Steve, my crotch smells like flowers.

<p class="MsoNormal">Back to our regular programming

<p class="MsoNormal">Back to the bloody chamber, the SOG team celebrates their victory

<p class="MsoNormal">"yay"

<p class="MsoNormal">HAPPY TIMES, but suddenly the van came in at top speed taking all of the team with it up into the sky, all of the team was holding onto the van while it flew at top speed towards space, Mandalore was like "I iz driving" ^ w ^ and Scary was all like :D "YAY", Bree who was the closest member to the driver's window knocked on it "MANDALORE! SCARY! STOP THE CAR! STOP THE CAR!!!" Mandalore tilted his head at Bree, he just tapped the window with his paw as in *Calm down silly ^w^* the van went so fast that it went back to the past, the van crash landed in Mars in the very past, where humans were nothing but monkeys and pokemon trading cards were the trend and a packet was 8 cents each.

<p class="MsoNormal">Mandalore wiggled his tail and was all like *told ya* ^w^, mars was all a red desert no life was there except Joey the nice hobo.

<p class="MsoNormal">Meds panicked "WE ARE DOOMED WE WILL HAVE TO EAT EACH OTHER THEN WE WILL DIE!"

<p class="MsoNormal">Col.Sexypants added "I believe we only have 30 zeconds before one of us tries cannibalism"

<p class="MsoNormal">Dusty was already trying to eat Areis, but suddenly Rockyz pointed at a nearby cave "THERE! quick!" Ruby raised her eyebrows "wha? why there?" Rockyz turned and said "The rocks told me to go there..." Ruby growled "IM THE ONE TELLING YA ALL WHERE TO GO!!!" pointed at the cave "THERE NOW!" Meds raised a finger "but it looks dange-" Ruby leaned closer and said between growls "I will RAPE you..." Meds ran towards the cave, so did the rest.

<p class="MsoNormal">Once inside they saw that it was the lair of Ganon a deep voice could be heard coming from the darkness that surrounded the place:

<p class="MsoNormal">"Well well well...look who we have here, the SOG twerps...are finally here...YOU ARE TOO LATE SOG TWERPS...while you were out there killing my targets, I was finishing the details of my REAL plan."

<p class="MsoNormal">"What do you mean?!" Flaky growled

<p class="MsoNormal">"You see...that timelord you met, was the real Ganon...I brainwashed him and disguised him as one of them and threw him into the sea to trick you into killing my...competitors...for my ultimate goal is to rule the world that for that I must be the baddest mothafucka on this side of the galaxy...HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Uhm...that...does not make sense..." Bree said = - =U

<p class="MsoNormal">"SILENCE!..now that you SOG twerps did my job...there is only one more target to kill...and its GOOGLE'S headquarters...and with this ultimate laser I built...I will destroy GOOGLE AND BECOME POWERFUL! HAHAHAAHAHA!"

<p class="MsoNormal">BACK ON EARTH, GOOGLE'S HEADQUARTERS

<p class="MsoNormal">A cave with the words GOOGLE painted on the entrance

<p class="MsoNormal">"UNGA UNGA BUNGA" *George we need those reports for tomorrow*

<p class="MsoNormal">"AKA ULUKA MUKA!" *Sorry I have been having troubles to sleep and I'm pretty lightheaded*

<p class="MsoNormal">"ASASASAKUKUAKAAA" *Don't worry go home and take a rest, I will finish those reports*

<p class="MsoNormal">"EKA UKA MALA SALELEOA TURUTTAAMEKELFO" *Hey guys today is Monday so you know what does that meaaan~ IM WEARING A G STRING*

<p class="MsoNormal">"OTOLA MALAKFO" *Damn it Steve*

<p class="MsoNormal">BACK ON MARS

<p class="MsoNormal">"HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH well now...there is only one more thing"

<p class="MsoNormal">"Hey guys and gals, it is me Mutahar and you are going to die fuckers"

<p class="MsoNormal">A WHITE BEAM OF ULTIMATE LEVEL 999 WIZARDNESS OF ULTIMATE POWER SHOT FROM MUTAHAR'S HANDS.

<p class="MsoNormal">This was it...THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN!

<p class="MsoNormal">"QUICK! EVASIVE TACTICS!" Flaky ordered, everyone avoided the white beam, Flaky and Tyrin fusioned into Flaryn, his hands turned into blades as he charged at mutahar, at the same time Bree charged her blaster, Sshaken charged at Mutahar fists up, Babylon loaded his rocket launcher, Viper prepared his minigun, Rockyz prepared his fists, Col.sexypants was ready to inject mutahar with aids and other illnesses, Dusty had her mouth opened ready to bite, Areis was ready to shoot his dolphin beam, Ruby was ready to mindfuck Mutahar, Unknown charged ready for to whip him with his tail, Marcus was lifted his scythe in the air ready to cut down mutahar, Nipples was already pressing his nips together ready to shot a milk beam, Meds was riding Jerry as he charged directly at Mutahar about to tackle him, Crazycya was in his ball form rolling towards mutahar, Mandalore and Scary were all like "LALALA~".

<p class="MsoNormal">This was it, time slowed down...everyone was about to strike on Mutahar, and then:

<p class="MsoNormal">COMERCIAL BREAK:

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER!

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER!

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER!

<p class="MsoNormal">SPIDERMAN'S SUPER WEB BLASTER!

<p class="MsoNormal">Back to our regular program:

<p class="MsoNormal">Mutahar deflected all attacks he was protected by a shield of ultimate power, everyone was sent to the other side of the room:

<p class="MsoNormal">"HAHAHA TOO BAD SOG TWERPS!"

<p class="MsoNormal">"DID SOMEONE SAY TWERK?" a voice said, Mutahar looked around confused then Miley Cyrus came in a beam of white light twerking:

<p class="MsoNormal">"NO NO NOOOOOOO!!!" screamed Mutahar as a white light engulfed the room, and the team was sent back to their time all good and well.

<p class="MsoNormal">"What happened?..." wondered Crazycya

<p class="MsoNormal">"Guess we are back to our time" Viper guessed

<p class="MsoNormal">"But...didn't we change the past? with all the killing?" Bree said, and then they realized that the world was now dominated by Robots.

<p class="MsoNormal">DANCING AND SINGING TIME: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUjGUWo4HrU&feature=c4-overview&list=UULTogo67nHP-DNU452Lqv2w

<p class="MsoNormal">AND SO EVERYONE SUNG AND DANCED.

<p class="MsoNormal">THE END

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