Talk:Linda/@comment-25021327-20160728023410

For a first creepypasta, this one isn't too bad. Some of the atmosphere in the beginning succeds at being a little creepy, the way that Linda is acting is certainly weird and would upset most people. As it went on, it started to get a little less easy to believe, but it didn;t really go too far into crazy territory for the most part.

Toward the end things started getting a tad crazy a tad quickly. The closing sections about Linda's family being a group of insane cannibals, although it is something that is technically scary, felt a little cliche and silly to me. Almost like it was tacked on to make Linda seem crazier. I think that personally I would ahve liked a slightly more vague ending where the reader doesn;t know exactly what was up with Linda and her family.

There were some spelling and grammar mistakes, some of which I fixed up,  but some remain. One of the things that was a little distracting to me was the way the tense changed from past to present randomly.

'' We have the same exact dreams, on the same exact day and we woke up and fell asleep at the same time. Same dream of being kidnapped in my perspective. I was terrified and I cried a few times in the bathroom that day. ''

That exerpt changes from present tense (We have the exact same dream, instead of had) and then changes to past (I was terrified and cried). I find it is usually best to try to keep everything in the past tense.

So this one wasn't bad for a first pasta, I've seen far worse certainly! Like I said, the setup and atmosphere at the beginning were okay, but I felt like it started to flounder and derail a bit toward the end.