Talk:My Creepypasta: S A V E U S/@comment-25400723-20141020213317

The idea behind this pasta is understandable, but you just haven't conveyed the idea well enough. Is this supposed to be one story, or one story but with different time stamps like a journal? I think that if you tried to merge what you have typed here into one whole story, it would be a lot more presentable, and the story would make a lot more sense. Like I said before, I think that the idea of this is pretty good, but if you turn it into a story with a little more detail and background you can turn it into something great.