Talk:The Forgotten Ones/@comment-25021327-20150126031705

This was a pretty entertaining read. I've never played any Spyro games, and don't know much about the mythos of the universe. However, I felt pretty well able to follow along with what was going on here due to things being adequtely explained with game text, and in inner-monologue exposition.

The pacing felt very good to me here. Things moved along smoothly and never really felt jumpy. Conversely, though this is a longer story, I didn't think it dragged at many points. As I mentioned, the descriptions were good enough for a non Spyro player to imagine everything and follow along. I appreciate the pictures added to the story, but in the first two, I couldn't really tell what I was looking at, or supposed to be seeing.

The plot is one that I feel I've seen a few times before. That of the player abandoning a game, only to come back to things in a state of disarray. I initially felt like letting out a groan when I read the dialogue addressed to Spyro in regard to his 'leaving.' I was expecting the story to go the less interesting route of player-leaves-game-for-years player-comes-back All-characters-and-NPCs-hate-player-and-want-to-punish-him/her. But this story went a different direction, less creepypasta, and more fantasy, and I can dig that.

Spelling, grammar, clarity, and format were in good shape. I think there may have been a few issues, but nothing distracting. I didn't see any plot holes or anything here either. The resolution was pretty standard, but worked well. There was some good vocabulary here as well.

So I enoyed this one. I read it mostly in one sitting (I stopped because I was doing other things, not because the story wasn't holding my attention), and would hope that people wouldn't be turned off by the fact that it's a bit longer than the standard gaming pastas here. I hope some people who have played the games find this. A Spyro fan may get more out of this than I did, but I enjoyed it.