Talk:Born again/@comment-7706473-20140618100351

Since I diverged about the glories of OE below, I'll add my two cents about this. It's... Rather short, isn't it? That's not necessarily a bad thing, but I'm not terribly familiar with World of Warcraft, and unfortunately that means that the effects of the story don't really grab me. That's all right - especially if you're just interested in writing for WoW players, or those familiar with the lore. If you're writing as a story primarily to scare as many people as possible though, it might not hurt to try to think of a few more factors.

Perhaps it'd be more effective to have a longer story, for example; or make the short story itself more jarring, with an ending segment that hints at something shocking without spelling it out for the audience. The ending felt abrupt, perhaps because there's little build-up to make the reader care for the nameless and descriptionless others. The spelling and grammar aren't bad - so perhaps for your next work, try for a longer or more involved story. And keep in mind that though this wasn't very scary for me, a lot of that is because I'm not familiar with WoW - you might have information as (I assume) a player, that makes this much more frightening.