Talk:One/@comment-1810325-20131019225141

I enjoyed the general vibe of this story, it felt like a modern take on an old story. Person does something that seems gernerally harmless, though it still breaks a rule, and they get a punishment ten fold. I think it works. A slower build up might help, and some aspects of the dialog kind of irk me (but that's more of personal thing), but overall it was an alright story.

Keep up the good work.