A Bad Day To Be Present

Everyone didn't like to be at school. You didn't that other guy didn't, those columbine victims. We all hated school. Your plan was to make the day go by faster by hitting a tab of LSD. Hopefully math wouldn't be too hard to do while high.

And you did get high. 'OH SHIT' what's this why is everything all pixelated. SLAP! 'What's that sound?' SLAP! Running for your life you walked into a classroom.

"And that students is how I lost my virginity." The teacher explained. 'Phew' the slapping was gone and you decided to open up a book and do some math. '280+1, hmmm that should equate to exactly one tooth and a sliced pickle.' Reaching into your pocket of teeth you retrieved one and placed it onto the book, then you placed the pickle onto the book as well.

"Very good you've excelled beyond belief." The teacher stated. Another math question came and you circled D. SLAP! SLAP! Your heart was racing now you were sweating so hard the Niagara falls got jealous. Entering through the door was a bald mother trucker, balder than vin diesel or bruce willis. He said nothing his dead pan stare with no blinking penetrated you harder than that guy in that rat costume at chucky cheese.

You ran past him out the door only to meet him.

"I wish I was mark Wahlberg." Mark Zuckerberg wept.

"MOVE IT OR LOSE IT LOSER!" You screamed kicking him the balls, he crumpled to the ground crying and sucking on his thumb. You ran away without thoughts of guilt but thoughts of 'he deserved it that reptilian son of a bitch'.

Long story short that bald buck bnown bas baldi shoved that ruler he was slapping his hand with up your ass. For the first time in a long time I've written a happy ending. The end.