Talk:System Failure/@comment-25021327-20150716232053

I actually didn't dislike this as much as others seem to have. I thought that the writing was fairly competant and displayed a certain amount of style. The plot here is nothing too groundbreakingly original, but it's not too bad either, there were a few spots where it could have gone in different directions, and I honestly wasn;t sure exactly which way it was going to go. It strangely reminds me of the film Deadly Friend (Which no one has seen)

Sometimes the blog post style doesn't really work, but I didn't mind it here. I thought the pacing was pretty nice, could have been a little slower but it worked all right. Things moved along very quickly in terms of the AI being designed, but the narrator is continually expressing that things are moving faster than even he expected, so it works as a plot point.

Spelling and grammar here were good as far as I could tell. i only saw one typo, but being that this is a blog post style pasta, it gets a bit of leeway in that regard. One of the entries here (can't remember which) is dated 2015, where the others are all dated 2014, so that probably ought to be addressed.

So I thought this one was okay. As far as first pastas go, it's much better than most that I've read. I'm glad I gave this a read