Talk:Monstrum intrinsecus/@comment-205.236.31.231-20150105163641

Overall, this was an okay creepypasta. Its far from the best I have ever read, but its not truly terrible either. There was a few clichés, and the whole story reminded me of something from the SCP foundation, with the whole attempted containment of this "evil within". The grammar was off in a few cases, making it a bit hard to understand. Plus, it doesn't make much sense that the scientists would just keep going into the chamber and committing suicide. You could of at least tried to explain why they had to do that, or why they were doing it. Instead it just feels like everyone in the place already had a deathwish.

I know it is somewhat of a cliché, but I really do like the actual title of the story. Sure, "latin for something else" is common, but in this case it actually works, making the title actually stand out from the droves of other stories. The basic idea of the story is pretty good as well. Pretty much, with a few improvements and expansions on certain parts of this story, it could actually be great.

Current rating: 6/10.