The Blind Man Ritual

Have you ever wanted revenge on someone? Was there somebody whom you have hated so much that you just wanted them to suffer? Well, perhaps this ritual may be for you. It will summon a spirit who will do your dirty work for you...but there is a catch. True to his name, the Blind Man does not see; he feels. This will become important when the time comes.

To perform this ritual, you will need the following: an index card or other piece of paper, a writing implement, and some sort of equipment with which to start a fire. You will also need to perform this ritual in a remote location; deep in the forest is a good option, so as to not risk people intruding as you perform the ritual. You must come alone, with no one else nearby; if there is more than one person, the Blind Man will not show himself. You also cannot bring any alternative sources of light, such as flashlights or phones.

Once you have arrived at your location, quickly get to work building your fire. Once you have a decent-sized fire going, write the first and last name of your target on the paper and then toss it into the fire. Once this is done, recite the following incantation:

“Blind Man, come and sate my ire.

Vengeance is what I desire.

You are just what I require,

So please, come join me by the fire.”

If you have done all these steps correctly, the fire will blaze up intensely before dying completely. Looking around, you will find that you cannot see anything. You are, for all intents and purposes, blind. Do not be alarmed; this is simply the Blind Man telling you that he is here, and ready to hear your terms.

This is where the Blind Man feeling rather than seeing becomes important. The person whose name you wrote on your paper must be somebody who has wronged you personally. So, for instance, you cannot write some politician’s name because you don’t like them, nor can you put some pop singer’s name on there simply because you think their music is terrible. The Blind Man will feel for a personal bond between you and the target; if he finds it, he will do as you ask. If he does not, though, then he will redirect your request to you. Furthermore, the wrong has to be to you personally. If a police officer arrested your relative and you want the Blind Man to target the officer, the Blind Man will instead feel the bond with your relative and kill them instead. Examples of acceptable targets include people such as classmates who may have bullied you in school, or perhaps an abusive step-parent you had as a child.

Now, when the Blind Man arrives, do not panic, and do not attempt to re-light the fire. He removes the light from the area to ensure that both parties are blind; so that you and he can talk as equals. He will speak first; the first thing he will say is the name you wrote on the paper, and then ask if this is the person whom you wish to have revenge on. Say “Yes,” and he will ask how you wish your revenge to be exacted. Be as creative as you want; the Blind Man will find a way to make it happen, so long as it isn’t something like a unicorn coming in from nowhere and impaling them through the chest with its horn. This can be anything from an accident in the kitchen, to your target drowning in their own bathtub. Once you have given him your method, the Blind Man will say “It will be done.” He will say this regardless of whose name wrote down and whether or not he actually felt a personal connection between you and that person. Light will then return to the area, signalling his departure. You must then immediately put out the fire and leave the area.

The Blind Man will take three nights to perform your task; by midnight on the third night, your revenge will have been enacted. You will know the deed is done when you hear your victim’s agonized scream while you sleep. You’ll awaken, startled, perhaps even a little afraid. That is when you will notice a note right next to you, signed by the Blind Man, saying “The deed is done.” At first you will be satisfied; after all, the one whom you so despised is now gone from this world...that is, of course, until the next night. See, the Blind Man does not perform these services for free; the following night, you will pay the price. From that night on, every night, you will hear the agonized screams of your victim, tormenting you until the end of your days. From then on, you will have to live with the consequences of your actions, constantly reminded that you were responsible for the taking of a life. But surely that isn’t too much of a burden, right? After all, you got what you wanted.

So tell me, my children: is revenge really worth it?

-MJSchooley