Talk:Flout/@comment-28242661-20160420185120

This was great! I would rate it 8/10!

The plot was amazing and the concept just felt unique, even though this isn't the first time its been used. I loved the structure and the clear and vivid descriptions that were givin to the reader. My only gripes would be that, 1; There were a few errors in the sentance structures. There are some missing commas, and some weird wording here and there, but nothing major. 2; Though the concept was amazing, I feel the execution was a little off. It was very smooth up until he rolled into the wall. For me, that was a give away. 3; The present tense speech was a little awkward. It might just be personal preferance, but  it just felt a little 'off'.

All in all, this pasta was great. Nice build up, good plot, good writing; it's very good. All of my gripes should be taken with a grain of salt. I wan't to see more pastas like this. ~ <3