Talk:The Mountain Man/@comment-25249478-20150103001656

Alright.

Decent mindfuck, though I figured it out in the 2nd to last Paragraph. The pacing, although, needed some work. It all went by too fast! Though, the horror element of the story settles in well at the end of the story. Though, there are some problems I had with this.

1: Grammar. Grammar is a MAJOR component to any story, and I'll be honest, the grammar isn't perfect here. It took away from the horror feeling to the story.

2: Detail. There wasn't much detail to this story, and detail is crucial when it comes to horror stories. This story lacked all sorts of details, and it, sadly, made it seem less creepy than it could've been.

CONCLUSION: Lack of detail, and grammar issues are the problems I had here. Especially the detail. Like I said, detail is crucial when it comes to horror, it's used to help you imagine what's happening perfectly in your head as you read. Pacing could've been better, but the horror element settles in well at the end. And the mindfuck is decent.

This pasta deserves a 5/10. Keep working on writing! You're sure to improve!

Oddest of them all! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 00:16, January 3, 2015 (UTC)