Talk:Sold as a Crow/@comment-25021327-20141010154332

I thought this one was an interesting read. A topic of all-too-familiar horror in world history, especially recent history. And ripe pickings for the short horror story genre.

The fact that this is inspired by the lyrics to a song subconsiously compels me to scrutinize the writing more deeply. I read the lyrics after I finished this story, and noted that a few of the descriptions and wordings were taken directly from them.

I feel like this story could be expanded upon a bit more. The subject matter, and short jumpy style works better in a the format of a poem, and I think this particular story would have been more effective as a stand alone piece were the reader given a bit more context. As it is, I felt like it read as simply a companion piece to the original poem. But as that, it works well.

There were a few issues with spelling, and tense, and some wording that I felt read somewhat oddly. Things like'' "...as people dropped from roof to roof..." and "...they were rest assured..."  ''read strangely to me although I completely understand what is meant by the statements.

I did mostly enjoy the story, and I'm glad I gave it a read. I hope that you would take the fact that I gave this a far less "candy coated" critique than I give to some other stories and authors as a compliment.