Talk:Experimental Soldier/@comment-8470110-20130916181625

6/10

For a first Creepypasta, it wasn't half bad. The pacing was well done, details was good and the characters were three-dimensional. As for the 'mindf*ck aspect, there are a few things that can be changed. There were a few sentences here and there that hinted too strongly towards the subject matter, such as 'eating most of the dictator's army'. There is definitely room for improvement like making it more cryptic and adding more details in some parts, but for the most part, it was an enjoyable read. Good job, my friend!

-Sshakenbakee