Talk:'Happy Birthday' from Youtube/@comment-98.25.86.58-20170103215950

I put the story in Gizoogle translator and this is what I got: "Now I know what tha fuck you thinking. I be crazy. Yep, thatz dat shit. In fact, itz straight-up true biaaatch! I, as a matta of fact, be indeed crazy. But crazy, has not a god damn thang ta do wit what tha fuck I saw. I can't remember If what tha fuck happened was cuz of tha computer, or cuz of tha joint... or cuz of mah dirty ass. But I DO remember, dat I saw it, every last muthafuckin thang. Yep! Straight-Up true biaaatch! So, I'ma begin, by introducin mah dirty ass. Hoes call me Erric. Fuck dat shit, Errika! Yes muthafucka! Thatz dat shiznit son! I almost forgot. I be a biatch wit total OCD, which be a excuse ta make me have 2 birthdays a year instead of one. I be also a cold-ass lil computa geek where only Youtube was mah only playa yo, but it ain't no stoppin cause I be still poppin'. Fuck dat shit, seriously, back up in dat day- well, ever- I had no playaz muthafucka! They all mysteriously disappeared. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! But dat do not matter, cuz I did mah work(actually I may have slacked a lil) n' as soon as I was done, I went straight ta mah computer n' shit. Da only thang I straight-up do on there is play Slenderman, n' peep 'lets read' creepypastas on Youtube though... so... yeah... I straight-up gots nuff props fo'the creepypastas I peep on youtube. I be thinkin itz funky how tha fuck tha main characta has such a problem wit they surroundings. If you ask me, I would've been fascinated!... I think... Well, thatz what tha fuck I thought before I had... well, clicked tha wack vizzle on Youtube, I guess. So afta a thugged-out dizzle of hard work,(not straight-up) I hopped on mah computa n' went ta Youtube. When I looked down all up in tha recommended vizzles, I saw various creepypastas dat I have already seen. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. But there was one vizzle on tha bottom dat was titled,"Do not peep dis vizzle" Dat shiznit was labeled dat dat shiznit was blocked yo, but I clicked on it anyways, n' it turns up dat tha vizzle was fine n' dandy, n' was loading. I noticed dat tha vizzle was somehow renamed n' it holla'd,"Turn it off now, nahmeean?" I shook mah head n' continued ta look around. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I was astonished when it holla'd dat it broke 3,000,000 views. But when I looked up in tha comment section, there was no comments, n' you can put dat on yo' toast. Well shiiiit, it didn't even say dat any comments was ta be blocked. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I could even write a cold-ass lil comment mah dirty ass yo, but I didn't exactly gotz a reason to... I looked all up in tha description yo, but it only repeated,'I be sorry' n' it seemed like forever n' shit. Disappointed, I put tha vizzle on full screen, n' played dat shit. Then, I noticed dat tha timer, n' tha red dot seemed ta disappear, n' 'Live' rocked up on tha top right corner. I then saw pitch black nothingness, n' a hoe whoz ass seemed ta be starin at me, outraged."Oh, pimped out, another one." Biatch holla'd."Turn tha vizzle off, now, nahmeean?" Biatch holla'd, straight-up sternly. Jokingly, I smiled n' shook mah head. "Fuck dat shit, you can't just... look, you can't peep dis vizzle, It will bust a cap up in you, nahmean biiiatch, biatch? Stop! Go back a page, do something, other than watchin this!" I was a lil' bit shocked, since she reacted ta mah dirty ass. I straight-up had no other chizzle but ta say something. "Can... you hear... me son?" I stuttered. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Da hoe grill palmed, as her dope ass drew her hand outta her face, her big-ass booty holla'd,"Really, biatch? Of course I can!" I looked all up in tha screen oddly, as she only rolled her eyes. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch crossed her arms n' looked all up in mah face."J-just turn off tha vizzle." her big-ass booty holla'd. "Why?" I asked, still a lil cold from tha fact dat I be poppin' off ta mah computer n' shit. "This will bust a cap up in you, turn it off no-" Suddenly interrupted by something, dat both of our asses could not make out."What...?" I holla'd, n' suddenly tha hoe ran away from tha camera. "Little Errika, aiiight birthday!" a voice holla'd. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Trippin I holla'd,"What, biatch? But dat was like a month ago!" Suddenly, I felt weird... I felt like I was chillin up in mah chair fo' like a long-ass time. I couldn't feel anything. "Fuck dat shit, silly dawwwwg! Todizzle is yo' 36th, birthday!" Da voice holla'd, cheerfully. "But... I turned 22 a month ago..." Now tha voice seemed ta be comin from a gangbangin' figure dat seemed ta take shape of a person.. yo. Holdin a cold-ass lil cake."Wrong again, yo' 36!" Da voice holla'd, now annoyed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Don't you keep track of ti-" Da voice was interrupted by suttin' we both couldn't make out. Well shiiiit, it seemed familiar, as tha thug dropped tha cake, n' ran away. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Suddenly tha figure disappeared, n' a scream took place, as red splattered across tha non-existent floor. Then another voice holla'd "Kool as fuck 48th birthday, Errica!" A playa rocked up wit tha same cake as before. Except now dat shiznit was covered up in blood. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! Confusion, n' warinizz flowed all up in me, as a gangbangin' finger-lickin' dirty-ass sharp dagger pierced all up in tha manz throat yo. Dude dropped tha cake, up in which it seemed ta somehow land perfectly upright. I couldn't stop starin at dat shit... I couldn't think.. fo' realz. And I felt, somehow... sad... "Kool as fuck 99th birthday!" a third... 3, biatch? Another voice seemed ta say... That I was 99... n' mah eyes  was burning, I felt so tired... like I wanted ta bust a cap up in mah dirty ass. Then, all I saw was a mirror, wit tha cake, n' a straight-up oldschool person. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I squinted mah eyes ta peep whoz ass it was yo, but then tha thug squinted her eyes, like a muthafucka. Then... I realized... dat thug was mah dirty ass. I be soopa-doopa tired. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Da screen was so bloody... Da cake... I ate dat shit... I don't give a fuck bout mah dirty ass... Da cake is gone. There is no mo' birthdays... no... mo' n' mo' n' mo'. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Suddenly, Two bars side by side rocked up. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Dat shiznit was a pause button. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I warily put mah hand on tha mouse, n' clicked dat shit. Only ta find tha lyrics dat finally holla'd "Bust a cap up in yo ass." Whispers all round mah crazy ass kept chantin tha lyrics. Suddenly a glock materialized, I picked it up, n' put it ta mah head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "Kool as fuck Birthday." I holla'd, as I pulled tha trigger. Da vizzle paused. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I was breathang heavily. I had ta repeat dat dat shiznit was just a vizzle ta keep mah dirty ass sane. I can't do this, I can't. I closed mah computa n' went ta mah room. I was mad chillaxed but I needed ta peep tha mirror fo' realz. As I approached it, I saw a lil' biatch, wit blue eyes, long brown hair, all dem freckles, n' dark wrinklez under her eyes, indicatin she needed chill. I looked around. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! A regular room was round me, wit tha straight-up dope fumez of tha dim light of mah candles. I strutted ta mah bed, closed mah eyes, n' fell tha fuck onto tha soft covers. Da last thang I heard before I blacked up was, "Kool as fuck Birthday.""