Talk:Dream Eater/@comment-5675310-20140530034505

Dream Eater... I donut noe wat 2 sai abowt this

Description: 2.0/10 - There's really not much I can say about this. Grammar is terrible, nothing's really described properly, and the dialogue (which makes up most of the story) feels false and bland. Other than that, there's really not much to say. It honestly pretty deplorable.

Plot: 4.5/10 - You almost had me, I'll admit it. However, you used up too much of the page to write the beginning and talk about David. It only gets interesting nearing the end, but then you soil that great writing chance with a horrible twist at the end. My advice, cut the beginning so it doesn't drag out too long, and then make the rest of the story about how David disappeared and why everything's gone to shit. It makes for much more intriguing story. Oh, and change the ending twist.

Entertainment: 4.0/10 - The beginning goes on too long and the interest doesn't last long.

Pros and Cons:

+ Almost interesting story

- Horrible grammar

- Cheesy dialogue

- Terrible ending twist

- Beginning is too long

Overall: 3.5/10 - Terrible.

"Keep trying, you will get there!"

- Marcus