Talk:Paper Mario: The Door To Doom/@comment-11079349-20131123045049

So ... i find myself reading anyother creepypasta that, while not bad, is not great either. i reviewed this earlier with the little experience i had and now i feel as if i said too little back then. so I'm going on a quick list of things you did right and things you did wrong.

1. Hell is an overused cliche. You pulled it off rather well, but I rolled my eyes, like everyone else probably did, the moment i saw hell in the story.

2. The subtle, yet completely relevent changes were an amazing touch that i can't seem to pull off myself. props for that.

3. that title screen made you wanna vomit? wow, I'm surprised you werent drowning in it by the mid point of this creepypasta.

4. The japanese game was a bit ... odd. it worked for it's purpose, but the last decision was sort of hit-or-miss, and while some people will like it, i was sort of meh about it. it didnt really seem to have that much of an impact. then again, if it were english, you probably would have chosen the right answer, so it works.

5. You're supposed to pass it on, and you did to your friend, but if it's meant to be passed through all kinds of places, why was it not also in more languages, or was the point that the english text was translated by some sort of region sensing ... thing.

6. koops died? NOOOO!

7. what happened to goombella?

8. did mario die? was he hanged? (and yes, hanged is the proper term here.)

9. so ... the shadow queen was the embodiment of satan? that works, i suppose.

10. I like how the "dead?" creatures didnt actually have animations. it added another dimension to the story.

11. wow this is a long list.

12. nice screen shots, but anyone could have done that to be honest.

13. you kept the atmosphere consistant, so good job. even with the cliches, it worked.

14. THERE IS NO 14!!!

15. the bowser fights were pretty good, especially with the dead one taking no damage until the end. nice, unique, and not over played with the one-hit ko like creepypastas usually do.

16. This is something i could see being made into a hack, so the realism is really prominant.

anyway, after that long list of things, i would like to give this a solid 7.7/10 lol. i apologize for all the jokes, but i couldnt resist after seeing the "i wanted to vomit" part. it made me laugh.