Talk:Cartridges/@comment-25029585-20140619062741

What the- No. This, is bad. Let's see... Where shall I start? So, coming in, you talked about cartridges and it was like a history lesson of the evolution of cartridges. Then, you add this part, which is really hard to follow, where you get the cliched cheap-looking mysterious game cartridge. Then, I'm supposed to believe that a news report shows you and your mother 30 years later? There is so much wrong with that. Like, how are you supposed to know how you'll look like 30 years later in your life, and the only way, I think, the news reports were able to get this story was time travel. Then again, the narrator is young, so it could've been coincedental. I hope it is.

So then, the child is mentally scarred by the previous scene, gets over it, and plays the mysteriously labeled game. And turns out, it's the scariest game ever, Pong! Ok, gripes aside, the game is a prototype, so it's bound to have bugs, like loud static noises. Yet, the narrator makes note of this, but keeps playing and bleeds his ears out. Sounds like something I'd do (sarcastic)! Then it ends with the narrator's mother dieing and him being taken to an orphanage. I guess if I was playing a game with loud static noises, I wouldn't hear the violent stabbing of my mother.

Overall, 3/10, Just... No.

P.S.- You forgot signature and categories.

Steelwingred (talk) 06:27, June 19, 2014 (UTC)