Talk:The Devil's Pendulum/@comment-6061247-20130402021555/@comment-7706473-20130719122401

Generally, administrators use their time to clean the site, watch for vandalism, and help people learn the rules through example, since reading the welcoming greeting is often too much to ask. But! But, because I'm in a good mood right now, I'll review this for you, incensed and completely random wikia contributor!

The writing style is pretty strange. Sentances like this... "But the thing about my job is I am what some people refer to as a Pokémon Detective which is similar to a regular detective but I take cases that involve people using Pokémon for bad deeds." ... Seem extremely redundant. As an example to the author - would you see anything wrong if I introduced myself like so?

"My name is Stormlilly. The thing about my name is like a Lilly of Storm, and my job is sort of like a regular Lilly, but I also do other tasks which involve using flowers and words."

The sentances isn't strictly wrong, but it says the same things multitple times. This detracts from the story which... Isn't actually that bad, but is told in a manner that gets old quickly. Derivative of the old 'Hypno is eeevil' myth, which I never liked myself, the main character is interesting and the idea of losing children is always scary and solid - but the characters aren't fleshed out enough to relate to, so any feeling of fear is defeated by that -

- And the random and far too long battle sequence. Shouting attack names will never be scary, unfortunately. Finally, my good contributor, please go here! You may notice that Areis is an admin, and that one of the rules in the Rules of the Road states that not adding categories is a three-day ban. As such, a one-day ban is lenient, especially given how frequently this issue crops up again, and again, and again.

Just something to keep in mind.