Thread:Sshakenbakee/@comment-24288270-20131216174606/@comment-8470110-20131216182728

The main criticism I have about your pasta is the way it's written. It sounds like a conversation between two people rather than a formal piece of writng. That really took me out of the experience, personally. Not only that, but it was pretty cliché as well, packed together with an alright concept and poor execution. I'm sure that if you work on it, it'll be able to reach its full potential. Best of luck to you and if you have any questions, feel free to let me know.