Talk:I Won't Leave You/@comment-24240632-20130727222144

First let me say that this whole thing was a really good idea, but it's not perfect. With that said let's begin.

Description: 8.75/10 - It was great and only had a handful of spelling and grammar mistakes, but there was one recurring error. You forgot the space after the ellipsis. You also had the problem where it seemed like you used words over and over again, but it wasn't quite as bad as the issue in Hanging Gardens.

Plot: 9.5/10 - This was an amazing idea that was for the most part executed perfectly except for the sometimes cheesy lines and how you tried to fit so many emotions into one story. Those "cheesy lines" feel like they were just slapped in there without much though.

Entertainment: 9/10 - It was boring and slow at the beginning, but it's forgivable because you did a great job at introducing the characters and getting people attached to them. Once you get further in the story you won't want to stop reading though.

Overall: 9/10 - Outstanding. Very well put together and quite gripping. Although the sometimes cheesy lines and the way this feels sort of crammed does sort of rip away from the experience it was rather good.

"There's something special with this pasta that you have to read to find out."

- Marcus