Talk:The Ruins of Wind/@comment-7706473-20140605101233

Not bad - there are some spelling and grammar errors (by any chance, are you an english as a second language speaker? A lot of the 'mistakes' I'm talking about were similar to my high-school writing/middle-school writing mistakes), but the overall concept was pretty cool! I don't think it's really a scary story at all - more a kind of urban legend, the one you'd hear people talking about near a campfire burning in a barrel after the end of the world. You got me pretty interested in the setting, and I wouldn't mind reading more about the backstory at some time, if the ideas ever come to you.

I will highly recommend you remove the 'this is my first pasta' disclaimer, though! It's an old thing amongst admins, but generally no one cares if your first pasta is your first; it's viewed on it's own merits, good or bad. You've had time to write before, after all; and everyone improves by writing more, so even if you feel it could be better, that's fine. You can always edit grammar/spelling and try new styles for later things you write, after all!

Probably the coolest thing to me was that there was no 'monster' or villain; Wind is just an enigmatic figure who may or may not even exist. That lends an air of melancholy to the story which is pretty refreshing. Again - I have to say I like it! Withered astroturf, for a school long since abandoned...