Thread:MLAToday/@comment-209.193.18.114-20130327210707

I find it a little sad that the only comment you currently have on your story Bead Dice Sky is trivial category talk. You clearly put a lot of effort into the story, and I enjoyed most of it - I think we have similar views on what the truly frightening things in creepypasta are people.

Tom/Tristan just annoyed me for some reason, but it has nothing to do with the quality of your writing and more to do with me, personally. The other characters are fairly flat (as necessity dictates) beside the narrator, who is one of the strongest narrators I've read in a pasta. Their emotions are just amazing, and captured perfectly.

The use of gameplay elements to lend an aura of dread, mystery - and dawning horror - is perfect. The reader will likely figure out long before the instructor what is going on, which only make the innevitible more horrifying. To say nothing of random thoughts like - could this have been prevented..?

Very good story. Hope to see more from you. 