Talk:Shadowman on the wall/@comment-29502200-20160823230620

OH BOY REVIEW TIME

Title: I like it, not a whole lot more to say

The rhyming scheme works. It's short enough that the idea of AA,BB,CC,DD, etc. doesn't get boring. What absolutely destroys the story however is your use in words, they feel too basic and edgy.

Also starting almost all of your sentences with 'He" ruins the story as well. 'He' humanizes the character, making them loose all forms of mystery. Be more gender-neutral about it. Instead of using  " He watches from above. -  He fits in the shadows like a glove. -  He wants you to hide -  He waits for you to decide."

I would use more of a "Shades of black watch from above. - It fits in the shadow like a glove. - Fear wants you to hide. - Temperence waits for you to decide."

Overall Review: 5/10 - Interesting idea, but there isn't enough to make the poem unique. Bascially, it's basic.