Talk:FEAR.avi/@comment-25021327-20170528002840

Sorry it took be a while to read this, I'm not around the wiki as much as I used to be. This story felt a little unrefined and hard to follow at times. Although there was some effort put into explaining the software and methods used, I felt that it was too easy for this person to get into government archives, and his motivations were kind of underdeveloped. If these weren;t actually official gov't things, I think that should have been clarified.

The descriptions of what happened in the videos were okay but felt kind of stale to me. I had a hard time getting very invested in them. The Rake reveal at the end felt sort of like it came out of nowhere to me. I mean, I suppose it's just as good as having it be any other fictional creature, but I didn;t think there were any clues to let the readers think that this might be a Rake pasta.

There are also some spelling and grammar issues throughout that were a little bit distracting while I was reading. This one felt a little lacking to me. Sorry if this review came across harsh or discouraging, I didn;t intend i