I Can't Stop Screaming

I looked around my room, getting up from my desk. My mother had called my name, needing my help with the yard work. I felt the warm air flow onto my face as I emerged. Walking over to me, my mother spoke.

"Violet, can you please finish the weeding? I was planning to make something cold to drink."

I nodded and began to get busy. Pulling up weeds, I felt something. Not a presence, but something. Like that feeling when someone is walking by, or as my mother would say, "a possum walked over my grave." I knew something wasn't right, but I just continued to work, knowing I get that feeling every now and again.

The air was constricting my breathing, it was so hot. I couldn't understand how mom could work in this heat for as long as she has been. I stood up, taking off my gloves, and marveled at my job. I was waiting in the shade for my mom to come out, since I knew she had an issue with being bothered when doing something. I would ask her why, but she never liked to talk about it.

She later emerged, holding some smoothies she made. She handed me one and we began to talk.

"I remember when you were younger and you used to shove your face into the smoothies, because it was so hot out." She chuckled.

"Stop, mom..." I was embarrassed when she began to talk about it.

However, I noticed her eyes seemed distant, like she was looking at something and not paying attention to me. I didn't touch my smoothie, I was too worried with what she seemed to be staring at.

"Mom?"

No answer.

I shrugged it off and made my way back into the kitchen.

I remember that day vividly. It was nice and warm, the sun hurt my eyes so much I had to get a hat, and I got the worst sunburn of my entire life. Ha, good times, huh?

Everything seemed to be perfect for me. Too perfect. I was with the girl of my dreams, my mother was happy, I was happy. Which is unusual.

I began to jolt around in my sleep, sometimes even so violently, I would wake up cold, blanket tossed on my floor. I never confronted my mother about this, however. She didn't seem to focus on me. Like I was being ignored most of the time.

As the time went by, somewhat faster than normal, I began to forget things more rapidly. I couldn't remember my mother's birthday, what day of the week it was, and later, what my girlfriend's name was. I decided to stop by my school counselor, who recommended me to a specialist.

I was diagnosed with short term memory loss. It struck my loved ones hard, but not me so much. It was like I was watching a gritty movie through my eyes. Forgetting more and more things down the road, not being able to rewind or record things...

Rewind, Record...Rewind, Record...

I can't see anymore, or at least, I don't think so. All I see is a bunch of vivid, wild colors. As if you were on LSD. Please don't ask me how I know that... But all I could think of was those words...

Record, Rewind...

Over and over again....

Record, Rewind... Record, Rewind...

I began laughing more and more hysterically at the smallest thing. And tapping my foot all of the time.

My moving in my sleep began to get rougher. I woke up, feeling enveloped tightly in my blanket, making breathing hard. Sometimes the struggling was making it worse, so I just cried in defeat.

I began to shake out of nowhere, but it wasn't that same shuddering feeling I mentioned prior. The possum over the grave thing, but this was worse.

My eyes began to twitch out of nowhere, it started out small and began to escalate to be more often than before.

My girlfriend and I broke up today. She was heartbroken, but I could care less. I was ill, they said. Like there was something horribly wrong with me.

But there wasn't...

I KNEW there wasn't.

I began to wake up to a bright light, screaming. I made full sense of what was going on, but I just screamed. All I began to ever do was scream. My throat was hurting, but I kept screaming. I... I couldn't stop.

I WANT THIS TO STOP!!

PLEASE!!

I began to weep...

Please.... Please, I don't want to scream anymore....

Make it stop, Dear God, make it stop!

For the love of God make it stop! STOP!!!! I DON'T WANT TO SCREAM ANYMORE!!!

I cried hysterically, screaming with a smile of insanity on my face.

STOP THE SCREAMING

STOP THIS PLEASE

(Out of main character POV)

Patient- Violet Ebony Harrison

Reason for Arrival- Insanity

This audio recording is what was played to the researchers and doctors of the brain waves the subject was emitting. She has been in the asylum for a month now, recalling memories and forgetting them frequently. All she does is scream. We have placed her in a straight jacket, but she continues to struggle. We must keep her alive, but she will only stay alive as long as she keeps screaming.