Talk:Super Mario 128/@comment-30102911-20161025144046

First off the number of factual errors at the beginning are quite easy to pick out and even with a suspension of disbelief only scratches the surface of giving the reader an idea of what this game spawned from. The game itself sounds more like a beefed up tech demo than a game that was in the works at some point rather than an actual game that Nintendo planned on releasing. There are several things that could have built on the story to be something interesting but the skimmed details don't really give the reader much to be enticed. I can see some amount of effort in here but the story really does need quite a bit of work to be a truly well written piece.