Talk:The Sad & Strange Fate of Vincent/@comment-7706473-20130725101254

But I like Ronove! ;)

I said I was going to review this before crashing, I think, so I'll try; it may not be my most ace review since I'm pretty tired. It's a pain, but you need to learn the wiki formatting; it'll help make your writing both more professional and more accessable.

The structure of the story at first confused me; I wasn't sure what to expect, and that played to the advantage of the narrator - and like Sater, I found the protaganist remarkably likable, especially strange as I generally hate all things all the time. On the other hand, I rather liked that the various supernatural events are somewhat vague - just vague enough to leave even the protaganist unsure.

There's a few places I'd advise use of vagaries to leave things uncomfortable. The section about Vincent's father's fate could be left vague and unspecified; prison is bad enough as it is, let the audience imagine what might have happened. I think you've mostly got this down, though; and it's largely a matter of personal preference.

What else... Basically, I'm both hoping that Bjorn mostly has the rest of his life go okay and/or simultaneously want to see all those around him suffer; there's a sort of dark humor in surviving terrible, uncertain things while everyone else around you, er, desn't. Clean up the formatting (try taking a look in the 'source' tab of your own story to see what does what) and I'll be interested to see what you write next!