Talk:Jest/@comment-11366536-20160628014741

Okay, uh, well this is a new case.

For starters, I like the concept: A marine diagnosed with severe PTSD goes crazy and comes up with his own version of events as opposed to the harsh reality in which he had actually killed his own daughter. However, the execution seems poorly done; it doesn't really come in as a shock and instead is done more or less as a sudden revelation. The shortness of the story is kind of a letdown, I really wanted to see just a bit more detail. I noticed a few grammar mistakes in the text as well, but fortunately they weren't bad enough to make the story suffer. The story is also paced pretty well, and there are few cliche's in the story that one can notice.

Overall, I admire the idea, but it just could've been preformed a whole lot better.

Final Verdict - 7/10 (Average)