Talk:Remove the Need/@comment-25021327-20140823213024

I think this is a decent pasta. It reads easily, the and the style and pacing are pretty good, and consistent. The story is nothing too revolutionary, but the concept of abstractly dealing with remorse is fertile ground for storytelling.

I feel that this pasta would benefit from more description of what the narrator feels guilt about. Spilling someone else's secrets can be pretty reprehensible, but I feel that some of the other "things" the narrator had done could have been explored more. If he/she is going to off themself, the reader might benefit from knowing more of the justification, or knowing more about why telling Thomas's secret caused such intense guilt and remorse.

Pretty good story, and good for a first attempt :) Keep on writing, and keep on reading!